Welcome to Snarkfest

Welcome to my snarky corner of the web. Join me as I discuss everything from wine to chocolate. There may be a few other topics mixed in there too. I talk a bunch about my amazing offspring, 19 and 17. I sometimes go on and on about my secret crush on the amazing Mike Rowe. I talk about things that irritate me or things that make me happy. Sometimes I just talk to hear myself talk. Feedback is always appreciated but please make sure it's respectable. No nudity or profanity. I'm the only one allowed to be profane. But any and all snark is welcome and appreciated!

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Rushers, Directioners, Duranies, OH MY!

Back in the day, we called ourselves Duranies. We followed the Fab Five in every piece of reading material we could get our hot little hands on. Remember Tiger Beat? Teen Beat? Bop? Rolling Stone? (yeah, that's still around). We Duranies had to WORK to find out the latest on our heartthrobs back then. Google? There was no Google! Cha Cha was a Latin dance. We were JUST getting into push button phones, for God's sake. We didn't have computers, internet, cell phones, texting, iPads, i-anythings!! We had to walk 10 miles in the snow, up hill, both ways, barefoot to buy magazines and darn-it, we liked it! Sure, every so often MTV would throw us a bone and have an interview with our boys and we'd all set our VCR's and watch them over and over. That was OUR Youtube. Pfffft. 'Friday Night Videos' was the shit and you watched it EVERY FRIDAY NIGHT just hoping they'd show your favorite band's video. And you checked MTV every chance you could get because back then the M actually stood for 'MUSIC' and not 'Manure' 'Malarky' or 'Merde'. 

Today, you can get information on your favorite band in less time than it took me to type this sentence. And these kids have NO idea how lucky they are. God, I know, I sound just like my mom did when she used to tell me how lucky we had it because we had a car with air conditioning and pleather seats! When SHE was a kid she rode in the rumble seat and she liked it!

Oh sorry, back on topic. My kids now can access any website at any time and see their favorite bands, Big Time Rush and One Direction. They are now considered "Rushers" and "Directioners". One Direction, for those of you who are living under a rock with my mom, is the NEW Fab Five. The next best thing. This is the nickname they have for themselves: Directioners. And they apparently take that nickname very seriously. Case in point: Last night 12 was on the computer and 14 was texting way later than her cutoff time of 10:00. And 12 kept calling 14 over to see what Louie's new haircut looked like or what someone was saying about Niall. Apparently, some absolutely INSANE chick on 1D's FB page (stay with me here mom: One Direction's Facebook Page) had the absolutely audacity to say she loved Harry and Zayn but didn't really care for Niall. "Well then she's not a Directioner!" I heard 12 say, and 14 agreed profusely! Apparently, there is a rule written somewhere (maybe it's tattooed on Harry's skull?) that in order to qualify as a Directioner, you MUST love ALL 5 MEMBERS of the group!!! Disliking one is the equivalent of disliking ALL 5 and you will have your Directioner club card taken away and you will be forced to listen to.....ugh, the Jonas Brothers.

Yes, apparently they're a little more strict today then they were back when I was a Duranie. Back in MY youth, you didn't HAVE to like all 5 members to be in the club. Hell, I never could STAND Andy Taylor. He was my least favorite of the Taylor brothers. I always wanted to take scissors to that nasty, greasy little ponytail of his and run off with Simon LeBon, spend hours laying on the beach drinking Pepsi and mocking Andy. (ok I was 16, and not yet the sleazy stalker I am today). That was the beauty of being a Duranie, you could like whomever you wanted and NOT like whomever you wanted and you weren't judged. There were 5 of them, PLENTY to go around.

Not today. Today, if you don't like one, you OBVIOUSLY don't like ANY of them. They apparently come as a package deal. It's the Directioners code.

I'm not sure if the same is true for Rushers, because my girls, while still very much in love with BTR, are more serious about the 1D rulebook. Is it POSSIBLE that you can LIKE the way James looks but hate the nasally, whiney sound that comes out of his mouth? I don't know. But if that is not the case, apparently I'm out of the Rushers club.

25 comments:

  1. NaziwhackjobcrackhoAugust 9, 2012 at 4:20 PM

    LOL you crack me up...when Van Halen broke up it was clear that I was following Alex, Michael and of course my lover, Eddie even with Valerie being his bride. I double pinky hexed that marriage, so sorry Valerie. I have a hell of a pinky hex...just ask all the Dallas Cowboy kickers. It actually helped your Phillies out one night last year when we were chatting back and forth about the game.

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    1. I do believe we're not watching enough Phillies games together because they're doing so poorly.

      So I take it you weren't a big David Lee Roth girl??

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  2. Too funny, Teri! I can hear your voice reading that, lol. Write ON, chica!

    Kerri :)

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    1. Thanks, Kerri!! Hard to let go of the snark once it gets hold of you. And thanks for reading. We BADLY need a weekend!!!!

      Teri

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  3. I was a Menudo Maniac (a fan club) and I loved Robby Rosa! Yeah, I was also waiting for Friday night hoping to see them there!

    Venus

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    1. Hey Venus, the only thing I remember about Menudo was that maybe Ricky Martin was a member? Is that right? And is that what you guys were referred to as? Menudo Maniacs? Any special code you followed?

      Teri

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  4. John Taylor was my world! Swoon. My room was covered - walls AND ceiling - with Duran Duran posters. I even got my hair colored like John's. I remember all too well watching MTV all day hoping to see just one of my favorite videos. Now they can watch them over and over with one click. Yeah, kids have it good alright. But they still complain. "Mom! I lost the tv signal on my phone!" *eye roll*.

    Found you on the Friday Hop and I"m following you! C'mon by and visit me at my place!

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  5. LOL I'm closing my eyes and I can imagine exactly how your room looked because it's exactly how MY room looked, only mine had pics of Simon LeBon. Thank for following me and I stopped by your page and returned the favor! Pleasure to meet ya, fellow Jersey girl.

    Teri

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  6. OMG LOL I loved this! You are too funny! I can only imagine what my life will be like in few years when I have 4 teenage girls...EEEK! I loved BOP, my walls were plastered with posters of JTT, Justin Timberlake, and every boy band imaginable. OH how I miss those days of thinking boys were "dreamy"....

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  7. I will pray for you. I've got 2 and am having a hard enough time keeping track but 4 teenage girls?? Jesus, take the wheel!!

    ;)

    Teri

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  8. Hehehe-- always funny in the land of Snark!

    BTW, I stopped by to let you know I have nominated you for the Sunshine Blogger Award, 'cuz you're awe-SOME! Stop by the Crazy Train and pick yours up today!

    http://delirious-mom.blogspot.com/2012/08/aw-shucks-people-think-im-great.html

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    1. Thanks Christina!! I will do that later on this evening. You're da bomb diggity!! (is that how these kids say you're cool these days?)

      T

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  9. This is great! I have a 13 year old "Directioner". I was stuck listening to their song about a girl not knowing she's beautiful and that is what is beautiful about her. I had to point out to my girl what a messed up message I found that to be. And then I felt just like my own mother telling me the stuff I listened to had a bad message. But seriously!! This song makes it sound sexy to be insecure and shy. WTH?!

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    1. Bree, I think they could be making up songs by picking names out of the phone book and the girls would still think they were the shit. It's not about the message in the music for them, it's about how cute the boys are an how poppy and catchy the tunes are. Are you taking her to a 1D concert next year?

      T

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    2. She has mentioned it a time or two, maybe I will look into it. I know it would definitely score me a point or two ;)

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  10. YOU SPELLED LOUIS' NAME WRONG. GOSH, MOTHER.
    -Crazed Directioner 14.

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    1. Dear Crazed Directioner 14,
      Well his name is Lou-wee, right? Lou-wee is spelled Louie.
      Lou-issss is spelled Louis. I can't help it if he doesn't spell his own name right, 14.

      Now go clean your room.
      Love,
      Mom

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  11. I thank the stars everyday that my kids aren't into this "new" music. I miss the good ol days. Love this, sharing it, and thanks for linking up!!!

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    1. Lucky you!! No concert tickets, no hogging the computer, living on YouTube. I'm jealous!

      Thanks for hosting the Blog Hop!! You're awesome.
      Teri

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  12. I was sooo gonna marry Simon LeBon. My 8yo likes 1D - but thinks boys and marriage are kinda gross, so I am safe - for awhile at least.

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    1. I was gonna marry him, forever ago. Then I met him in 2007 and was happy that he never asked me. Your 8yo is right, boys and marriage ARE yucky.

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  13. I still remember listening to the radio all night and putting my tape recorder up to the radio to record "Tainted Love." And then getting pissed because the DJ talked over the end of the song. These kids today…they have no idea, for sure.

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    1. Oh I remember that!! I taped a DD concert live from Madison Square Garden and the DJ would NOT shut up! Drove me crazy!!!

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  14. "Um, helllooooo....The Jonas Brothers broke up, like, WEEKS ago. Uhhhh! So embarrassing when you try to talk like you know stuff!"
    random teen

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    1. "When I was your age, we did the jitterbug to Glenn Miller and we drank soda and had milkshakes at Arnold's diner!"

      Random old fogey

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