Welcome to Snarkfest

Welcome to my snarky corner of the web. Join me as I discuss everything from wine to chocolate. There may be a few other topics mixed in there too. I talk a bunch about my amazing offspring, 19 and 17. I sometimes go on and on about my secret crush on the amazing Mike Rowe. I talk about things that irritate me or things that make me happy. Sometimes I just talk to hear myself talk. Feedback is always appreciated but please make sure it's respectable. No nudity or profanity. I'm the only one allowed to be profane. But any and all snark is welcome and appreciated!

About Snarkfest



Me: I am a NEW YORK TIMES BEST SELLING AUTHOR for the book I Just Want to Pee Alone!! Sorry, just had to yell that. I'm an office administrator, scheduler, accountant, and chief pot and bottle washer for a small non-profit in my little town. Born in Philly, raised in Jersey, my heart will always be at the beach. I worked for too many years in the casino industry and needed to get out before it sucked the life out of me. I'm a runner, I'm a friend, I'm a mother, a sister, a wife, a daughter and a really snarkastic person. You can find me published in the anthologies I Just Want to Pee Alone, Parenting Gag Reel, Only Trollops Shave Above the Knee and It's Really 10 Months: Special Delivery. I also may or may not have a little crush on TV personality Mike Rowe.

He made me carry him around like this all day.  Pfft. Diva.

Hubby - I've been married to him for 21 years. They say never meet your honey where you make your money but lucky for us, that didn't ring true. We met when we worked together in Atlantic City, our first date was on New Year's Day. We got engaged in Disney World on the Natchez Riverboat in Liberty Square and we're living our happily ever after.

18 - My oldest daughter. Self-proclaimed band geek. She's a trumpet player in The Pride of West Virginia marching band. She's beautiful, she's funny, she's smart, she's talented, and if she could only get out of bed in the morning and make her bus, there probably wouldn't even BE a Snarkfest blog. I couldn't be more proud of her if I tried.

One of my favorite pictures of my girls. First time seeing each other since 18 went away to college. SO many tears!

16 - My youngest daughter. Jock, sax player in the band, volleyball player, basketball player, track thrower, schmoozer extraordinaire. That kid is my Bill Clinton. She feels your pain. She's sympathetic, she's witty, she's caring, she has a million friends, she is well-liked and I love her more than wine and chocolate put together. She has done Locks of Love 4 times and continues to make me proud every day.

Dumbass - Our 15 year old orange kitty. Her name is her destiny. She's already gone through about 4 of her 9 lives. The dogs want to play with her, she just wants her food bowl kept full and her litter box kept empty. Her real name is Cinnamon but we never call her that because she's such a dumbass.

Henry & Cosmo - Our 7 year old dogs. When we first adopted them, we were told they were dachshund mixes (they are brothers). I have more dachshund in me than these dogs do. Despite the fact that Henry is as lazy as a slug and Cosmo is easily distracted by anything shiny, we love these boys with every fiber of our being. Dumbass, however, has been looking for a way to get rid of them since they moved in with us.

9 comments:

  1. Nice family intro! I love it!! I am from around Atlantic City originally. Are you still in the area? I mentioned to you that I have a 13 year old. Here is my new blog http://somewhineandjeez.blogspot.com/ if you'd like to stop by. I am a new follower btw!

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  2. Great family. I love cats, so I"m rooting for Dumbass. My husband calls our one cat by that name too. Looking forward to getting to know you better. Saw you on YKIHAYHT.

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  3. I met and dated my husband when we worked together also. I wouldn't recommend it, every fight was so PAINFUL and we couldn't get away from each other all day, but if you can get past that without court-ordered therapy, you'll make it FOR LIFE. Great family. Nice mutant Doxies :)

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  4. What a great gang! My boy,s personalities are VERY similar to your girls!! Both band, baseball and track (the 11yo cannot join track until next year). My almost 14yo is the sleeper and total socializer. My youngest is the most caring and compassionate person I have ever met AND the funniest.

    Our dog children, along with a 10 year old (Bob), we have brothers also; they are named Henry and Davy (he was the runt :) - they are Golden Retrievers and are only a year or so old. I got them on clearance (half price) and BOGO! Our loves :)

    I follow you on FB and am looking forward to receiving your blogs.

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  5. I just finished reading your story in IJWTPA, I swear you wrote my story. Honest to God you had to be sitting at my house. It makes me feel so good to know that Im not the only one with 2 helpless daughters. My oldest is the same way when I get her to do the dishes, I LOL and the husband thought I was losing my mind while reading. Mine are 18 and 23 now and when she went off to college I went and cleaned her dorm room real good before she moved in and would clean it once a month. (Please don't tell anyone)but I promise you I have told her 100 times she better marry someone rich or get a good job because she will need a maid. She is in RN school, so I think she will be Ok, I hope? Thank you so much and I signed up for your emails.

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  6. Love the family. Your cat sounds like Garfield trying to get rid of Odie! Love that you actually call him Dumbass, bet he even comes when you call him that!

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  7. I just added your button to my blog. I love reading your stuff and you make me laugh!
    Sending love from Shenanigans of a Domesticated Diva(TMB)

    Christi

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  8. Your 14 and my 13 are twins i feel you!

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  9. FYI: Thought you'd like to read this article about this investigation of Locks Of Love, in case you hadn't already.

    Locks Of Love: $6 Million Of Hair Donations Unaccounted For Each Year!
    Nonprofit Investor did an analysis indicating that approximately $6 million worth of hair donations are unaccounted for each year by the West Palm Beach, Fla., charity Locks of Love.

    Highlights from Full Article published in Forbes magazine:

    Comparisons to other organizations illustrate the significant difference in the use of hair donations:

    Locks of Love. 104,000 hair donations per year divided by 317 hairpieces produced in 2011 = 328 hair donations accepted to produce 1 wig.

    Pantene Beautiful Lengths. 65,000 hair donations per year divided by 3,500 hairpieces produced per year = 19 hair donations accepted to produce 1 wig.

    In other words, it takes Locks of Love 17x as many hair donations to make each hairpiece. Additional organizations that accept donated hair include Ohio-based Wigs for Kids, Children with Hair Loss, and Michigan-based Wigs 4 Kids.

    Nonprofit Investor’s first “SELL” rating raises serious questions about Locks of Love’s operations and finances.

    Full report: http://www.nonprofitinvestor.org…

    Full article, Forbes Magazine: http://www.forbes.com/sites/quora/2013/05/13/locks-of-love-6-million-of-hair-donations-unaccounted-for-each-year/

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I do read all comments and try to respond to them. Unless you're trying to get me to visit your website: Cheap Louis Vuitton Bags. Then you can go pound sand.