Welcome to Snarkfest

Welcome to my snarky corner of the web. Join me as I discuss everything from wine to chocolate. There may be a few other topics mixed in there too. I talk a bunch about my amazing offspring, 24 and 21. I sometimes go on and on about my secret crush on the amazing Mike Rowe. I talk about things that irritate me or things that make me happy. Sometimes I just talk to hear myself talk. Feedback is always appreciated but please make sure it's respectable. No nudity or profanity. I'm the only one allowed to be profane. But any and all snark is welcome and appreciated!
Showing posts with label 1D. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 1D. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Everybody needs a break sometimes.....

I took this weekend off from the internet. Thursday was July 4 and I spent the evening with some awesome friends/fellow band parents, and when I got home, I read some of my book, Under the Dome. Friday, after running a hundred errands and working out, I took my girls to see One Direction at Hershey Park. I posted exactly one image to Facebook.
15, 13 and 30776 other 'Directioners'

Saturday, I spent the day floating on the Potomac River with two of my very best girlfriends, Lisa and Susan. WHAT an amazingly relaxing time. Beer, pretzels and tons of laughter.

Me, an ice cold Shock Top, and Susan's right leg. Does it get any better than this? I think not.

I'll never leave the river again. It's my new home.
Sunday after working out, I sat on my butt and read another huge chunk of Under the Dome before going grocery shopping. Guess what I did Sunday night! If you said "get on the internet" you'd be wrong. I read even MORE of Under the Dome. I'm now more than 650 pages into this giant tome and am really enjoying it. I've gotten over the whole "nothing in the book matching what's in the mini-series" anger I had after the first episode. I ranted a little, I know, and I apologize to Mr. King. I've accepted the changes and have moved on.

I also happened to notice on Sunday that our house had become hell. While there was no fire and brimstone (only me, a short curly-haired version of Beelzebub), there was heat.

Me, short, curly-haired Beelzebub. Like it?
A hell of a lot of heat. It was 88 in the house. Our run capacitor shit the bed. And apparently, I'm the only person on earth who doesn't know what a run capacitor is. Everyone we spoke with said "Oh did your run capacitor die?" The only capacitor I am aware of is the flux capacitor from "Back to the Future". And while I didn't DRIVE 88, it was 88 degrees in our house, so I'm sure that has something to do with a flux capacitor. Whatever, it was hot.

So Monday I went back to work and right after work I had to go home and make some quick plans to get a replacement babysitter to take over for 13, who had come down with some nasty virus while babysitting, go buy ginger ale and pretzels for said sick kid, walk the neighbor's dog (the amazing and loveable Raleigh), and get 13 out of our hotter than hell house and over to Lisa's nice, cool, comfy air-conditioned house. 13 slept in the spare room for awhile and Lisa and I had dinner (LeanMoms.com meal plans are really tasty!!! She had the turkey and feta burger, I had the dijon chicken).

While we were at Lisa's, our neighbor Joe the Plumber (I'm not making that up, I swear) got his hands on a flux capacitor and drove the temperature down from 88 to a nice, cool 73. While he didn't drive up in a DeLorean, he DID make my house feel comfy.

By the time we got home from Lisa's, it was time to watch week 3 of Under the Dome. 13 and I went to bed after it was over and that was yet another day of no internet for me. No FB, no Twits. It was actually kind of nice not being connected to the computer. I actually enjoyed it. I may do that more often.

That doesn't mean I don't love you, you gorgeous snarklings, it just means real life got in the way and it didn't suck. Don't worry, I will never quit you.

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Rushers, Directioners, Duranies, OH MY!

Back in the day, we called ourselves Duranies. We followed the Fab Five in every piece of reading material we could get our hot little hands on. Remember Tiger Beat? Teen Beat? Bop? Rolling Stone? (yeah, that's still around). We Duranies had to WORK to find out the latest on our heartthrobs back then. Google? There was no Google! Cha Cha was a Latin dance. We were JUST getting into push button phones, for God's sake. We didn't have computers, internet, cell phones, texting, iPads, i-anythings!! We had to walk 10 miles in the snow, up hill, both ways, barefoot to buy magazines and darn-it, we liked it! Sure, every so often MTV would throw us a bone and have an interview with our boys and we'd all set our VCR's and watch them over and over. That was OUR Youtube. Pfffft. 'Friday Night Videos' was the shit and you watched it EVERY FRIDAY NIGHT just hoping they'd show your favorite band's video. And you checked MTV every chance you could get because back then the M actually stood for 'MUSIC' and not 'Manure' 'Malarky' or 'Merde'. 

Today, you can get information on your favorite band in less time than it took me to type this sentence. And these kids have NO idea how lucky they are. God, I know, I sound just like my mom did when she used to tell me how lucky we had it because we had a car with air conditioning and pleather seats! When SHE was a kid she rode in the rumble seat and she liked it!

Oh sorry, back on topic. My kids now can access any website at any time and see their favorite bands, Big Time Rush and One Direction. They are now considered "Rushers" and "Directioners". One Direction, for those of you who are living under a rock with my mom, is the NEW Fab Five. The next best thing. This is the nickname they have for themselves: Directioners. And they apparently take that nickname very seriously. Case in point: Last night 12 was on the computer and 14 was texting way later than her cutoff time of 10:00. And 12 kept calling 14 over to see what Louie's new haircut looked like or what someone was saying about Niall. Apparently, some absolutely INSANE chick on 1D's FB page (stay with me here mom: One Direction's Facebook Page) had the absolutely audacity to say she loved Harry and Zayn but didn't really care for Niall. "Well then she's not a Directioner!" I heard 12 say, and 14 agreed profusely! Apparently, there is a rule written somewhere (maybe it's tattooed on Harry's skull?) that in order to qualify as a Directioner, you MUST love ALL 5 MEMBERS of the group!!! Disliking one is the equivalent of disliking ALL 5 and you will have your Directioner club card taken away and you will be forced to listen to.....ugh, the Jonas Brothers.

Yes, apparently they're a little more strict today then they were back when I was a Duranie. Back in MY youth, you didn't HAVE to like all 5 members to be in the club. Hell, I never could STAND Andy Taylor. He was my least favorite of the Taylor brothers. I always wanted to take scissors to that nasty, greasy little ponytail of his and run off with Simon LeBon, spend hours laying on the beach drinking Pepsi and mocking Andy. (ok I was 16, and not yet the sleazy stalker I am today). That was the beauty of being a Duranie, you could like whomever you wanted and NOT like whomever you wanted and you weren't judged. There were 5 of them, PLENTY to go around.

Not today. Today, if you don't like one, you OBVIOUSLY don't like ANY of them. They apparently come as a package deal. It's the Directioners code.

I'm not sure if the same is true for Rushers, because my girls, while still very much in love with BTR, are more serious about the 1D rulebook. Is it POSSIBLE that you can LIKE the way James looks but hate the nasally, whiney sound that comes out of his mouth? I don't know. But if that is not the case, apparently I'm out of the Rushers club.