Getting kicked out of book club...

I'm in a book club. Well, it's more of a wine club with books involved. I use my book as a coaster so I don't put my wine down on a slanted surface and spill it. That would be tragic.

Technically, I'm supposed to actually LEAD a second book club because I received this Book in a Box thing where they sent me 8 copies of a book and some wine, hats and jelly. Yes, jelly.

There are 18 ladies in my neighborhood who wanted to participate in my book club. I gave the book out to 8 ladies, they each read the book and passed it around in December to the other 10 ladies who wanted to read the book. All 18 neighbors read the book. I didn't.

My copy of the book is sitting on my nightstand, closed and collecting dust. Not a single word has been read. How do people have the time to read? I used to read. I used to be a reading fanatic! Seriously, I read like a maniac. My appetite for books rivaled John Pinette's at an All-You-Can-Eat Chinese Buffet! But then...kids. And then.....internet.

Let me tell you about my reading habit: Last summer I spent a week at the beach in Jersey and I read a Patricia Cornwell book from cover to cover. Why? Because I had very little internet access and I had ZERO activities scheduled with my girls. I got up in the morning, ran on the boardwalk, showered off the sweat, threw on a bathing suit and hit the beach. I read for hours on the beach, came home, showered, ate and read some more.

When I flew to San Antonio, I read for about 4 hours straight on the flight down (we made a refueling stop in Memphis which is why I had that extra hour to read). I read more than 200 pages of my book (another Patricia Cornwell book, by the way). I was alone on that flight down and didn't have to talk to anyone or drive anybody anywhere or be at a school or a gym.

I LOVE reading, and yet, I don't do it NEARLY as often as I should. Thanks kids and internet!

I'm also a creature of habit. Given a choice between an author that I've read dozens of times, and an author I've never heard of, I usually play it safe and go with the familiar. Sometimes that works, sometimes it comes back to bite me in the ass. I read Gone Girl last spring at the suggestion of several hundred people on the internet. I loved the first 9/10's of that book but hated the ending. And it was really hard to develop any type of feeling for any of the characters, because I wanted to slap the shit out of all of them. But I sucked it up and finished it, and then someone said "Oh you should totally read Dark Places" which is another of Gillian Flynn's books. Let me just tell you, that book is aptly titled. Holy shit, that was the darkest book I've ever read (and I grew UP on Stephen King books!!). Seriously, another book with characters I couldn't stand.

I totally need to get my book club books read. Totally. But my house is a mess, my kids have 2-3 basketball games each week along with practices, trumpet and saxophone lessons, volleyball. And then there's Face(timesuck)book. I may be in need of an internet rehab. If I try to quit cold turkey I may need meds. Or a straight jacket.

What books are you reading now and HOW do you find the TIME to read??

Hey, you! Do you read? Well, read on!

So Eli over at Coach Daddy participated in a literary challenge to list your favorite books and tag other bloggers to join in the fun. And while he didn't actually TAG any other bloggers, I jumped in and added my own favorites in his comments. And because I'm a lazy slug, I thought it would also make a great blog post, and rather than try to come up with a fresh, new idea, I'd use Eli's. So thanks Eli! If you are a blogger, or a cashier or a diaper changer or a wiper of other peoples' noses or if you've ever just read a book, please feel free to chime in and give your opinion on YOUR favorite books and why. You'll learn a little about me, I'll learn a little about you and if you want to use this on your own page, have at it! The more the merrier.

My faves, in no particular order:

Tuesdays With Morrie - Mitch Albom
I saw the original interview that Ted Koppel did with Morrie before he died and I was moved beyond words by what an amazing person Morrie Schwartz was. I loved Albom's book.

Night - Elie Wiesel
Mandatory reading in Catholic High School. I think I had the reaction they most certainly WERE NOT looking for, as it changed my beliefs in God forever. Haven't been a regular church-goer ever since I closed the book after reading the last page.

The Talisman - Stephen King & Peter Straub
The epic and wonderful story of Jack Sawyer and Wolf (right here and now!) that I have read at least 4 times because I love it so much. It's so funny that after having read this amazing book so many times, I always try to figure out which author wrote which part of the book. Very fun.

And now YOU go! Give me 3!

Oh Lord Jesus, it's a fire (or how I finished Under the Dome)

So I finally finished Under the Dome, the 1074 page book by my all-time favorite author, Mr. Stephen King. If you are still reading it and don't want to know what happens, go check out what's happening on YouTube. I hear the new One Direction video is out. (You're welcome) For the rest who have finished or who care, here we go.

Let me start by mentioning that I purchased this book LAST spring (2012) and started reading it on the auto-train on the way down to Disney last summer. I read some more of it lying by the pool at our hotel. And read a little more on the train ride back. I may have gotten to page 100, but then I put it down and never picked it back up again.

Until late May of this year. I decided to participate in the #DomeAlong, a group reading of the book with a bunch of other bloggers, hosted by Coffee and a Book Chick. This, in preparation for the miniseries on CBS. I posted my mid-way post here and am now ready to talk about the whole shebang now that I've finished reading the whole thing.

This is the first Stephen King book I've enjoyed in years! To be fair, there are a bunch that I either haven't read yet (11/22/63, Full Dark, No Stars) or have started but just lost interest (Duma Key, Just After Sunset) and some that I never, EVER intend to read (the entire Dark Tower Series**) but this is probably the best book of his that I've read since The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon. Yes, it's been a long time since I've really LOVED anything by King. Don't get me wrong, Black House was good, I loved revisiting Jack Sawyer, but it didn't grab me the same way that such old standards as It, The Stand and my favorite, The Talisman, grabbed me when I read those so many years ago. I've read each of those books at least 2 times. I may re-read The Talisman again soon too, if only to read about one of my all-time favorite King characters, Wolf (right here and now!)

Ok I'm digressing. About those little **'s up there, I'll say that I did read the first 3 books in the Dark Tower series and just couldn't stand them. I just did NOT want to pick up another book in the series, because I didn't care about any of the characters, I didn't care for the plots, I just did not like them. And that, of course, is MY opinion and I'm not hating on anyone else who thought they were the bees' knees or the cat's pajamas. If you loved them, good on ya! I'm happy for you! They just weren't my cup o'joe.

 Now getting back on the subject of Under the Dome: I. Loved. It. I cared about the characters, I wanted Julia and Barbie to hook up, I wanted Rusty and Linda's family to all make it through, I wanted the happy ending, and with the exception of about 780 residents of Chester's Mill dying, I got my happy ending. I was sad that Audrey the dog died, and that Benny and Ernie Calvert and Aiden and Thurse all died but to me they weren't as important to the story as Rusty and Linda and Julia and Barbie. I was so happy that Joe and Norrie survived too. Part of me wished that Big Jim's death was more tortuous and horrific. In the end, he deserved worse, but the image of him dying in a darkened room surrounded by the very people whose deaths he was responsible for was delicious. Very King-esque.

The huge fire that overtook most of the town from the explosion at the radio station was edge of your seat stuff! Just imagining the whole town being wiped out by a traveling wall of flames and heat was horribly entertaining. 

I couldn't help but make the connection with the aliens from this book to the alien from Dreamcatcher. Dreamcatcher's alien got inside you and controlled you, but these aliens basically put people in a situation and then watched how they handled it. Dreamcatcher's aliens were gross, these aliens were not as scary as described, but I was happy that Julia was able to connect with one and convince it to let them go. Maybe it's too neat and tidy a package, but in the end, things worked out. I like a happy ending. So sue me. But now I'm really looking forward to how they are going to go about making the miniseries even remotely similar to the book. I said this before and I'll say it again. In both the book and the show, there's a dome and a town under it. That's pretty much where the similarities end. So I'll try to enjoy the series (I'll still have Mike Vogel to appreciate as Dale Barbara) after really enjoying the book and try to keep them both as separate entities.

The opinions expressed in this blog are mine. If you don't like them, if you don't agree with them, don't try to change my mind, and please don't be argumentative. Homey don't play dat.

Under the Dome, Halfway There

If you're reading Under the Dome, Stephen King's 1074 page, 5 lb. book and you're less than halfway through, stop reading this blog post, because I will be discussing details and don't want to piss anybody off with spoilers. If you're NOT reading it but are watching the miniseries, you can keep reading because there's nothing for me to spoil. So far, the only similarity between the book and the miniseries is that there is a Dome. And a town. Under it. If you're not reading the book OR watching the miniseries, go read my friend Tracy's newest entry In the Powder Room, it's hilarious.

So here I am, at the halfway point of the book Under the Dome. Barbie was just arrested as a result of being framed by Junior Rennie (who is MUCH cuter in the miniseries than in my imagination while reading the book). In the show, he doesn't strike me as the necrophiliac he is in the book, but they changed that because necrophilia doesn't play very well on CBS. Fox News, maybe, but not CBS. Big Jim Rennie is a great protagonist, much like Pennywise the Clown (IT), Morgan Sloat (The Talisman), Randall Flagg (The Stand) and The Overlook Hotel (The Shining). He controls everything, pulls all the strings and wreaks major havoc to remain in power.

I know King loves to knock off major characters at the drop of a hat, but I was so sad to see Big Jim kill Brenda Perkins (sorry if this is a spoiler, I did warn you). I wanted her around long enough to help Barbie and Julia overcome the evil Big Jim but alas, what I want matters not to Stephen King. Now that she's gone and Andrea Grinnell has tossed the incriminating papers off the table and onto the floor, no doubt hidden and forgotten about until later in the book, I'll biting my nails until that important bit of evidence against Big Jim has been found. Good thing I grew my nails out in preparation for all the nail biting I'm going to have to do.

Moving on to the rookie 'cops' who raped Sammy Bushey, I hate them all and while I'm glad that Sammy shot Georgia Roux and Frankie DeLeppses, I just wish she'd have stuck around longer and had the opportunity to kill the other 3 rapists. But again, that's why King is a multi-gajillionaire who writes amazing novels, and I'm an office manager who writes a blog. Poorly.

In my juncture in the book, Rusty and Linda are in the basement of the Bowie Funeral Home examining the bodies of Angie, Dodee, Coggins and Brenda Perkins. Rusty is JUST about to see something different in the manner in which Coggins was killed but I had to stop to run 15 somewhere, so I'm hanging on the edge of my seat until I can get back there and see what he's found and if it will exonerate Barbie.

Ah, Barbie. Dale Barbara. I do enjoy reading about him and the actor who portrays him in the series, Mike Vogel, is fairly easy on the eyes, so I'm seeing him in my head and maybe enjoying his character a little more than I should.

So I'm crushed that he's been arrested with half the book left to read. I'm praying that his butt isn't rotting in jail for the rest of the story while Julia and Rusty are left to deal with everything going on. What I'm hoping is that the remaining selectman, the Keystone cops (with the exception of Linda) and the dumbasses who are at Big Jim's beck and call screw up badly and good triumphs over evil. However, this IS a Stephen King book and I've been a King fan since I picked up The Shining in fourth grade at St. Ann's and read it in the back of Sister Catherine's classroom when she wasn't looking. So I know better than to assume everything will be tied up in a nice little package with a bow.

I'm not yet to the point where Halloween happens, so I'm not reading any blogs from those who have finished the book, so don't leave me any comments on what's about to happen or I'll come to your house and eat all your food. One thing I'm disappointed in with the series (ok there are a TON of things I'm disappointed in but that's the subject of another blog) is that they cast Jeff Fahey as Duke Perkins. I really like Jeff Fahey and would've liked for him to be cast in another role, a character who would be around for awhile and not killed off in the first 45 minutes of the show. I IMDB'd Jeff Fahey and found that he was born in 1952, which makes him 61 years old. DAMN. He's one fine looking 61 year old man. I pictured Duke as an older man, probably late 50's to early 60's but NOT NEARLY as hot as Jeff Fahey. I was picturing in my little brain an actor like maybe Tom Bosley or Wilford Brimley (yes I know they are both older than 60 but I don't think EITHER of them are hot so they'd be much better in the role of Duke).

Anyway, overall I am LOVING the book and can't wait to read more. Whether or not I will finish the book prior to the end of the miniseries has yet to be determined. When I'm reading, I'm not cleaning the house, shopping for groceries, working, running the kids hither and yon. When I'm reading, I'm lost in the book. And I haven't really been lost in a book in a very long time. Maybe when the Harry Potter series was hot. I miss reading on a regular basis. But I also miss a clean house and a good home-cooked meal. Life's all about juggling. But this summer, Under the Dome is my wonderful obsession and I'm enjoying being lost in it.

Everybody needs a break sometimes.....

I took this weekend off from the internet. Thursday was July 4 and I spent the evening with some awesome friends/fellow band parents, and when I got home, I read some of my book, Under the Dome. Friday, after running a hundred errands and working out, I took my girls to see One Direction at Hershey Park. I posted exactly one image to Facebook.

15, 13 and 30776 other 'Directioners'

Saturday, I spent the day floating on the Potomac River with two of my very best girlfriends, Lisa and Susan. WHAT an amazingly relaxing time. Beer, pretzels and tons of laughter.

Me, an ice cold Shock Top, and Susan's right leg. Does it get any better than this? I think not.

I'll never leave the river again. It's my new home.

Sunday after working out, I sat on my butt and read another huge chunk of Under the Dome before going grocery shopping. Guess what I did Sunday night! If you said "get on the internet" you'd be wrong. I read even MORE of Under the Dome. I'm now more than 650 pages into this giant tome and am really enjoying it. I've gotten over the whole "nothing in the book matching what's in the mini-series" anger I had after the first episode. I ranted a little, I know, and I apologize to Mr. King. I've accepted the changes and have moved on.

I also happened to notice on Sunday that our house had become hell. While there was no fire and brimstone (only me, a short curly-haired version of Beelzebub), there was heat.

Me, short, curly-haired Beelzebub. Like it?

A hell of a lot of heat. It was 88 in the house. Our run capacitor shit the bed. And apparently, I'm the only person on earth who doesn't know what a run capacitor is. Everyone we spoke with said "Oh did your run capacitor die?" The only capacitor I am aware of is the flux capacitor from "Back to the Future". And while I didn't DRIVE 88, it was 88 degrees in our house, so I'm sure that has something to do with a flux capacitor. Whatever, it was hot.

So Monday I went back to work and right after work I had to go home and make some quick plans to get a replacement babysitter to take over for 13, who had come down with some nasty virus while babysitting, go buy ginger ale and pretzels for said sick kid, walk the neighbor's dog (the amazing and loveable Raleigh), and get 13 out of our hotter than hell house and over to Lisa's nice, cool, comfy air-conditioned house. 13 slept in the spare room for awhile and Lisa and I had dinner (LeanMoms.com meal plans are really tasty!!! She had the turkey and feta burger, I had the dijon chicken).

While we were at Lisa's, our neighbor Joe the Plumber (I'm not making that up, I swear) got his hands on a flux capacitor and drove the temperature down from 88 to a nice, cool 73. While he didn't drive up in a DeLorean, he DID make my house feel comfy.

By the time we got home from Lisa's, it was time to watch week 3 of Under the Dome. 13 and I went to bed after it was over and that was yet another day of no internet for me. No FB, no Twits. It was actually kind of nice not being connected to the computer. I actually enjoyed it. I may do that more often.

That doesn't mean I don't love you, you gorgeous snarklings, it just means real life got in the way and it didn't suck. Don't worry, I will never quit you.

Tuesday Tirade. Under the Dome.

Okay maybe it's too early to start making judgement calls but I'm annoyed. Last night, I watched the first of 13 installments of Stephen King's "Under the Dome", the TV miniseries based on the novel by Stephen King.

Let me give you a little history. When I was in 4th grade I read The Shining. Did I mention I went to Catholic school? Sister Catherine never had a clue, she was too busy eating or yelling at the boys to care what I was doing. I LOVED that book, I LOVED the feeling I got when I read it, being scared of the things I was envisioning in my head. I'm not a big fan of scary movies, slasher flicks, I never saw Saw. I actually made my friend leave the theater within the first 20 minutes of A Nightmare on Elm Street because it was too creepy. But you give me a good horror novel, one that I can sink my fangs into and my imagination goes NUTS. But in a good way. I can read when I'm home alone at night during a storm. I can read on the beach under the hot summer sun. I. Love. Horror. And I'm a Stephen King fanatic.

So imagine my disappointment with so many of his movies! With only a handful of exceptions (Creepshow, Stand By Me, Shawshank Redemption and most notably The Green Mile), most of the movies based on King's novels smell awful. Believe it or not, I did enjoy the original movie version of The Shining, however when ABC remade it staring Steven Weber (the other guy from Wings), I was tickled that they changed the scene where Danny is walking through the topiary and, from his peripheral vision, he can see them moving, but when he looks straight at the bushes, they are still, but in a different position than they were before. That part of the book absolutely excited me, and when I finally saw it on screen, I was just beside myself. It was exactly as I had envisioned it in my head when I was reading the book.

Fast forward to the opening scene of Under the Dome, and nothing is as I remember it. Keep in mind, I am only 2/3 of the way into the book, so I'm not truly into the blood and guts of the whole shebang yet, but there are so many things that aren't consistent with the book, I'm beginning to get discouraged. If you haven't read it, you'll probably want to just stop reading because you'll get bored and nod off. You may even drool on your keyboard a little. Don't blame me if it shorts out, I warned you.

For those of you still with me, here's my problem (ok I've got many). The book opens on a beautiful October day with the plane crashing into the dome. Nowhere in the opening of the book do we see Dale Barbara (Barbie) burying a body. Junior Redding kills Angie and her good buddy Dodie, he doesn't lock Angie in a bomb shelter. Angie is a waitress, NOT a candy striper! Julia Shumway is SINGLE, not married to a doctor. And what the hell is up with Barbie burying the doctor that Julia is supposed to be married to??? Linda the cop is married to Rusty, the doctor from the hospital, NOT the fire fighter on the other side of the dome. I thought Linda was a fire fighter or EMT. AND furthermore, Linda and Rusty are NOT newlyweds, they have been married for long enough to have 2 daughters. They have a dog who senses one of their daughter's seizures! So why are they mixing things up so much??? Oy vey, watching it, I found myself going 'what? wait, what?' so many times my family was probably getting irritated. They'll probably start their OWN Tuesday Tirade blog post.

I'll keep watching and I'll keep reading and I'll see if I get further annoyed or if it'll all start to tie together as it goes on. If you're watching and/or have read the book, give me your thoughts/feedback. I'd love to hear what you think so far.

And on a POSITIVE note, I'm down 3 lbs. as of yesterday morning. So far, my Soft to Sculpted program from LeanMoms.com seems to be working well!

Who are you? Who, who? Who, who?

So both Joy at Evil Joy and Stef at Mom-spirational have tagged me in a little thing that’s been making its way around the blogosphere called:  “Who the Hell Are You?” It’s this game that helps us get to know one another.  My mission, should I choose to accept it, is to answer 25 easy questions – then tag people.  I hate tagging people and making them answer questions but the life of my washing machine depends on it. And I don’t have any money for a new washer or a repairman, so I’m succumbing to peer pressure and tagging some folks. But first the answers to the questions from yours truly:

1.  Where were you born?  Methodist Hospital, South Philadelphia

2.  Were you named after someone?  St. Theresa the Little Flower (shut up). I was actually almost named Maureen but it didn’t really flow with my maiden name so they opted to name me after a saint (again, shut up)

3.  How many children do you have?  2 daughters: Damian and Satan.

4.  How many pets do you have?  2 dogs, Henry and Cosmo and 1 cat, Cinnamon (Dumbass)

5.  Your worst injury?  Since I’m so graceful, there have been many. I broke my littlest piggy toe the night before a trip to Hershey Park so walking from one end of the park to the other with my in-laws was nothing short of a little slice of heaven. I’ve also pulled my back muscles out a few times, and I once had an ear infection where the pain rivaled the scene in Indiana Jones where they pull the guys heart out of his chest

6.  Do you have a special talent?  Not sure if it’s a talent but I love to bake and I’m a baking maniac every Christmas

7.  Favorite thing to bake? Pear custard bars because everyone for whom I’ve ever made them absolutely raves about them. (see #6)

8.  Favorite Fast Food? Diary Queen French Silk Pie blizzard with twist ice cream (if you want to get specific)

9.   Would you bungee jump? Hell to the NO. But I would skydive. Go figure.

10.  What is the first thing you notice about people?  Usually their eyes. Especially if they’re crossed

11.  When was the last time you cried?  This morning when I saw this video:

 

Video courtesy of YouTube

 

12.  Any current worries? Always worry about money, my girls, if I’m a good enough mom, if I’ll ever lose weight, and my biggest worry is about my mom’s declining health.

13.  Name 3 drinks you drink regularly.  Water, coffee, wine (not necessarily in that order)

14.  What’s your favorite book?  The Talisman – Stephen King & Peter Straub

15.  Would you like to be a pirate? No because I sound ridiculous whenever I say ‘arrrrgh’ plus I look ridiculous in an eye patch and am allergic to parrots

16.  Favorite Smells? A real old fashioned bakery that makes cookies and cakes

17.  Why do you blog?  Because I can. I enjoy making people laugh and if by blogging I get to do that, then that is icing on my cake!

18. What song do you want played at your funeral?  Picasso’s Last Words (Drink to Me) by Paul McCartney

19.  What is your least favorite thing about yourself? Being short. If I was about 5’6” I’d be so much better proportioned, but being 5’1” my proportions are that of a member of the Lollipop Guild

20.  Favorite hobby? I absolutely love reading books but sadly I almost never have the time to do that anymore. Not a big fan of reading on a Nook or a Kindle but I supposed I should start getting used to it.

21.  Name Something you’ve done, you never thought you would do?  Run marathons

22.  What do you look for in a friend? A sense of humor.  If you are my friend then you have the ability to find humor in all different situations.

23.  Favorite Fun things to do?  Family nights with my crew, we do a lot of family movie nights and I love that. Also love running with my 15 year old.

24.  Pet peeves?  Liars, phony people, muddy, dirty dogs on my clean floor (ok my floors are never clean, quite possibly because I’ve got muddy, dirty dogs

25.  What’s the last thing that made you laugh? Talking to Holly Frye on the phone a little while ago. Holly always makes me laugh.

And now for those I'm tagging:

Life on the SONny Side

Pocketful of Joules

I Want Backsies

Gina Valley

Lorca Damon   

A Mother Life

Minivans, Meltdowns & Merlot 

Martinis & Minivans

Sadder But Wiser 

Motherhood: A Descent into Madness 

YOU'RE IT!!! Tell us WHO ARE YOU?!?!