Showing posts with label 13. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 13. Show all posts
Thursday, November 13, 2014
OMG! I'm In The Powder Room!!!!
No, not literally IN the actual room but today I'm poppin' my cherry and appearing for the very first time In The Powder Room with my post on losing my virginity and how my 13 year old (at the time) called me out on the carpet about it!! Check it out here! I am so excited to be In The Powder Room!
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Losing my virginity.....
Have you ever received one of those texts from your child that's pretty much a loaded question? I received one yesterday at work from my 13 year old. It went something like this:
"Hey mom, wanna answer me a question?"
Panic sets in. Did I throw away her prized collection of dust bunnies? Was she upset because I may or may not have given her way too tight tees and shorts to Goodwill? I braced for it, and said "Sure what is it?"
Drumroll please........................
"How old were you when you lost your virginity?"
What? What the.....HUH?? Yikes. She's 13 and currently single. Why would she need to know that? Well, apparently, she was (self-confessed) creepin' through my blog. She stumbled upon this post, wherein I answer questions because I had won an award. More specifically, question #6, how old were you when you lost your virginity. Naturally I lied. Who knew my kids actually DO read my blog? I should (clean) start putting (your) subliminal messages (room) hidden in text. That (bake) maybe (me) could (cupcakes) work (now!!!!).
So since she asked me flat out, and I don't lie to my kids (Santa and Easter Bunny aside, shut up) I told her. I told her that I was 18 (which is the truth), that it was awful (which it was), not enjoyable at all. Not special in the least. And that I regretted it almost immediately. It was with the boy I went to my senior prom with. We dated off and on but were never 'exclusive'. He lived with his grandmother, who was half senile. We used to party in his basement, all of us, and we paired off when it came time for prom. We fooled around quite a bit but never went all the way, not even on prom night. But one summer night after I graduated high school, he asked, I did and it was less than nothing to write home about. I explained to 13 that I felt dirty, cheap and used after giving him my virginity. I told her that your first time should be special, and it should be with someone you love, and someone who loves you back. Mine was not. Then she asked why I did it. I told her that I really liked him (not love) and I thought he'd like me more if I did it (which he didn't). What I didn't tell her, was that right after we did it, his grandmother walked in on us. I was mortified, I wanted to crawl into a hole and die. I was not only embarrassed to be caught, but devastated that what was supposed to be one of the most special times of my life ended up being one of the worst nights of my life. Right after we got dressed, I asked him to drive me home. And I believe that was probably one of the last times I ever spoke to him.
At 13, she knows that she is nowhere near ready for that step, and wants to wait until she's married. I told her that as her mother, I know that she will make mistakes and that she will learn from them. But I also want her to learn from the mistakes I've made because I'd love to save her from making the same heartbreaking mistakes. And I told her that losing your virginity with someone you love who loves you back, doing it for the right reason, isn't a mistake. But my reasons were wrong, and I will always regret it. And do you know what she said in reply? My 13 year old daughter said this:
"Don't live with regrets, everything happens for a reason."
"Hey mom, wanna answer me a question?"
Panic sets in. Did I throw away her prized collection of dust bunnies? Was she upset because I may or may not have given her way too tight tees and shorts to Goodwill? I braced for it, and said "Sure what is it?"
Drumroll please........................
"How old were you when you lost your virginity?"
What? What the.....HUH?? Yikes. She's 13 and currently single. Why would she need to know that? Well, apparently, she was (self-confessed) creepin' through my blog. She stumbled upon this post, wherein I answer questions because I had won an award. More specifically, question #6, how old were you when you lost your virginity. Naturally I lied. Who knew my kids actually DO read my blog? I should (clean) start putting (your) subliminal messages (room) hidden in text. That (bake) maybe (me) could (cupcakes) work (now!!!!).
So since she asked me flat out, and I don't lie to my kids (Santa and Easter Bunny aside, shut up) I told her. I told her that I was 18 (which is the truth), that it was awful (which it was), not enjoyable at all. Not special in the least. And that I regretted it almost immediately. It was with the boy I went to my senior prom with. We dated off and on but were never 'exclusive'. He lived with his grandmother, who was half senile. We used to party in his basement, all of us, and we paired off when it came time for prom. We fooled around quite a bit but never went all the way, not even on prom night. But one summer night after I graduated high school, he asked, I did and it was less than nothing to write home about. I explained to 13 that I felt dirty, cheap and used after giving him my virginity. I told her that your first time should be special, and it should be with someone you love, and someone who loves you back. Mine was not. Then she asked why I did it. I told her that I really liked him (not love) and I thought he'd like me more if I did it (which he didn't). What I didn't tell her, was that right after we did it, his grandmother walked in on us. I was mortified, I wanted to crawl into a hole and die. I was not only embarrassed to be caught, but devastated that what was supposed to be one of the most special times of my life ended up being one of the worst nights of my life. Right after we got dressed, I asked him to drive me home. And I believe that was probably one of the last times I ever spoke to him.
At 13, she knows that she is nowhere near ready for that step, and wants to wait until she's married. I told her that as her mother, I know that she will make mistakes and that she will learn from them. But I also want her to learn from the mistakes I've made because I'd love to save her from making the same heartbreaking mistakes. And I told her that losing your virginity with someone you love who loves you back, doing it for the right reason, isn't a mistake. But my reasons were wrong, and I will always regret it. And do you know what she said in reply? My 13 year old daughter said this:
"Don't live with regrets, everything happens for a reason."
Saturday, July 13, 2013
Stupid Pet Tricks (aka Our Dumbass Cat)
In our house, we have an adorable fat cat named Cinnamon, named for
her beautiful golden orange coloring. Her nickname, however, is Dumbass,
named for her penchant for doing absolutely ridiculous things. Dumbass
has been with us for almost 11 years. She was born on September 11,
2001. Yes, that day. It's very possible that had she been born on a
different day, she'd be nicknamed Einstein rather than Dumbass. Maybe
she'd have the ability to pee in the toilet, feed herself, cook dinner
and do laundry. But alas, that was not to be. She is now and forever
will be our little Dumbass.
"But Teri," one might say, if one were to question me, "Dumbass isn't a very nice nickname to give to that sweet, adorable little furball. Why don't you call her by her given name of Cinnamon?" Well, Sparky, I'll tell you why. Dumbass is called Dumbass because she's a Dumbass. Plain and simple. If she was a smart ass, I'd call her Smartass. If she were sarcastic like me, she'd be nicknamed Wiseass. But no. This is no ordinary Dumbass. This is a Dumbass who continually does dumbass things to retain the nickname. Maybe if she only did one or two dumbass things, we'd go back to calling her Cinnamon. But no, she continues to amaze and perform Dumbass moves, which keeps earning her that moniker.
Don't believe me? Ok, how about some history.
Back in 2004, my wonderful husband was deployed to Kuwait, leaving 15 & 13 (who were 7 & 5) and myself to fend for ourselves at home. Both girls were in before and after care at their respective schools (THANK GOD FOR THAT) and I was working 10 hour days. So I would drop the girls off at school at 6:45, work from 7:30 til 5:30 and then go back and pick the girls up and we'd all go home to have supper. One fine, cool fall morning, we did our normal routine with one exception. 7 had to get something last minute out of the fridge. She did so and ran out the door and off we went to start our day.
Fast forward to 6:00 that evening when we returned home from school and work. 7 opened the fridge to get out the juice and what surprise does she happen to find in the fridge? One very cold, very pissed off cat. "Mom" said 7, "why is Cinnamon in the fridge?" What could possibly be your reply to that question?? "WHAT??" Was about the only thing I could come up with. Had she just jumped into the fridge when 7 opened it? I picked Cinnamon up off the floor after she jumped out of the fridge and she was pretty damned cold. Not frozen, because she wasn't in the freezer, but as cold as, say a gallon of milk? Cold cuts? A jar of pickles? Yes, she was that cold. Which could only possibly mean one thing. Dumbass had begun her illustrious career as a Dumbass by getting herself trapped in the fridge for almost 12 hours. When 7 opened the fridge in the morning on her way out, Dumbass had jumped in, surely out of curiosity, and had then gotten trapped inside. Only by the grace of God, or the fact that the fridge was plugged in and thus, air was circulating, did she not die. I checked her as I held her chilly, furry butt and she looked okay. Stupid, but okay. I put her down and she walked back over to the fridge. When 5 came in to open the fridge to get herself some milk, guess who jumped back inside.
Dumbass in a fridge
And now you're thinking, 'maybe she's not all that bright, but really? It's still not a nice nickname'. Your honor, I give the court People's Exhibit B:
Dumbass in a drawer.
Yes, our little Dumbass just HAD to know what was in the back of that drawer. And when she got in there, she couldn't get her fat ass back out. Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking "Why didn't you help her out?? Why did you take a picture of her struggling to get her poor little feline head out of that bad old drawer??" Because no one would believe me if I didn't have photographic proof of her Dumbass-edness. Seriously. My cat got stuck in a drawer. It sounds funny, but really, you NEED this image to actually GET how funny it was. And yes, before you ask me, once I took the picture, I DID put the camera down and help her Dumbass out. Eventually.
Then there are the normal cat-like things she does. Things like, sit in a shoebox that's obviously not her size. She probably would've preferred a size 12 shoebox but alas, my feet are only an 8 wide, so she wedged her fat ass into a size 8 shoebox:
Fat Dumbass in a box
We actually thought for the longest time that her ass was allergic to the floor, because if there was a piece of 8.5 X 11" paper that fell on the floor, she'd go over and lie down on it. If there was a package of toilet paper rolls on the floor, she'd climb on it and lie there, almost claiming it as her own. If we could just get her to USE the toilet paper, life would be grand. She would lie on ANYTHING that was on the floor to keep her ass from actually TOUCHING the floor. Then there are higher places:
Dumbass on top of a cabinet
I believe she climbed up on top of the cabinet to draw my attention to the rather large, dirty cobweb that was up there that I'm too short to reach without a ladder. Why she didn't just grab a damn paper towel and clean the damn thing herself is beyond me. But there she is, up there on top of the cabinet, looking down on everyone as is the norm for her. It's as if she's saying "Look at this awful, filthy house in which I live. Cobwebs! How uncivilized!" Little bitch.
However, she DOES have her cute moments, like when 7 came home from school one day, went into the bathroom, put down her book bag, did her stuff and left her book bag on the floor. We later found Dumbass lying on said book bag, because, God forbid her ass actually touch the floor:
Dumbass on a book bag.
I think this picture needs no description:
Dumbass in a sink.
It's almost like she's questioning my right to take her picture. Look at that face, she may as well be rolling her eyes at me.
This is, by far, one of my all time favorite pics of Dumbass:
Dumbass on 15's ass. (I can't remember how old 15 was in this shot).
This is another one of those pictures I'm particularly fond of:
Dumbass doesn't like dog.
This was Henry the day we brought him home from the shelter, lying in the cat's bed. Why is Henry lying in the cats bed? Because from the second we brought that cat bed into the house, the cat has scoffed at it, questioning our sanity. "Why would you purchase that? I'll never lie down in that thing, not while there are drawers, cabinets, boxes, sinks or asses for me to lie on." That's what she says in that little Dumbass cat brain of hers. But when Henry decided he wanted to lie down in the cat bed, Dumbass would have none of it. Look at her tongue. She's obviously going to eat the dog for having the audacity to lie down on HER bed (that she's never used).
Yes, she IS a Dumbass and yes she DOES deserve her nickname. But she's our Dumbass and we wouldn't have her any other way.
"But Teri," one might say, if one were to question me, "Dumbass isn't a very nice nickname to give to that sweet, adorable little furball. Why don't you call her by her given name of Cinnamon?" Well, Sparky, I'll tell you why. Dumbass is called Dumbass because she's a Dumbass. Plain and simple. If she was a smart ass, I'd call her Smartass. If she were sarcastic like me, she'd be nicknamed Wiseass. But no. This is no ordinary Dumbass. This is a Dumbass who continually does dumbass things to retain the nickname. Maybe if she only did one or two dumbass things, we'd go back to calling her Cinnamon. But no, she continues to amaze and perform Dumbass moves, which keeps earning her that moniker.
Don't believe me? Ok, how about some history.
Back in 2004, my wonderful husband was deployed to Kuwait, leaving 15 & 13 (who were 7 & 5) and myself to fend for ourselves at home. Both girls were in before and after care at their respective schools (THANK GOD FOR THAT) and I was working 10 hour days. So I would drop the girls off at school at 6:45, work from 7:30 til 5:30 and then go back and pick the girls up and we'd all go home to have supper. One fine, cool fall morning, we did our normal routine with one exception. 7 had to get something last minute out of the fridge. She did so and ran out the door and off we went to start our day.
Fast forward to 6:00 that evening when we returned home from school and work. 7 opened the fridge to get out the juice and what surprise does she happen to find in the fridge? One very cold, very pissed off cat. "Mom" said 7, "why is Cinnamon in the fridge?" What could possibly be your reply to that question?? "WHAT??" Was about the only thing I could come up with. Had she just jumped into the fridge when 7 opened it? I picked Cinnamon up off the floor after she jumped out of the fridge and she was pretty damned cold. Not frozen, because she wasn't in the freezer, but as cold as, say a gallon of milk? Cold cuts? A jar of pickles? Yes, she was that cold. Which could only possibly mean one thing. Dumbass had begun her illustrious career as a Dumbass by getting herself trapped in the fridge for almost 12 hours. When 7 opened the fridge in the morning on her way out, Dumbass had jumped in, surely out of curiosity, and had then gotten trapped inside. Only by the grace of God, or the fact that the fridge was plugged in and thus, air was circulating, did she not die. I checked her as I held her chilly, furry butt and she looked okay. Stupid, but okay. I put her down and she walked back over to the fridge. When 5 came in to open the fridge to get herself some milk, guess who jumped back inside.
Dumbass in a fridge
And now you're thinking, 'maybe she's not all that bright, but really? It's still not a nice nickname'. Your honor, I give the court People's Exhibit B:
Dumbass in a drawer.
Yes, our little Dumbass just HAD to know what was in the back of that drawer. And when she got in there, she couldn't get her fat ass back out. Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking "Why didn't you help her out?? Why did you take a picture of her struggling to get her poor little feline head out of that bad old drawer??" Because no one would believe me if I didn't have photographic proof of her Dumbass-edness. Seriously. My cat got stuck in a drawer. It sounds funny, but really, you NEED this image to actually GET how funny it was. And yes, before you ask me, once I took the picture, I DID put the camera down and help her Dumbass out. Eventually.
Then there are the normal cat-like things she does. Things like, sit in a shoebox that's obviously not her size. She probably would've preferred a size 12 shoebox but alas, my feet are only an 8 wide, so she wedged her fat ass into a size 8 shoebox:
Fat Dumbass in a box
We actually thought for the longest time that her ass was allergic to the floor, because if there was a piece of 8.5 X 11" paper that fell on the floor, she'd go over and lie down on it. If there was a package of toilet paper rolls on the floor, she'd climb on it and lie there, almost claiming it as her own. If we could just get her to USE the toilet paper, life would be grand. She would lie on ANYTHING that was on the floor to keep her ass from actually TOUCHING the floor. Then there are higher places:
Dumbass on top of a cabinet
I believe she climbed up on top of the cabinet to draw my attention to the rather large, dirty cobweb that was up there that I'm too short to reach without a ladder. Why she didn't just grab a damn paper towel and clean the damn thing herself is beyond me. But there she is, up there on top of the cabinet, looking down on everyone as is the norm for her. It's as if she's saying "Look at this awful, filthy house in which I live. Cobwebs! How uncivilized!" Little bitch.
However, she DOES have her cute moments, like when 7 came home from school one day, went into the bathroom, put down her book bag, did her stuff and left her book bag on the floor. We later found Dumbass lying on said book bag, because, God forbid her ass actually touch the floor:
Dumbass on a book bag.
I think this picture needs no description:
Dumbass in a sink.
It's almost like she's questioning my right to take her picture. Look at that face, she may as well be rolling her eyes at me.
This is, by far, one of my all time favorite pics of Dumbass:
Dumbass on 15's ass. (I can't remember how old 15 was in this shot).
This is another one of those pictures I'm particularly fond of:
Dumbass doesn't like dog.
This was Henry the day we brought him home from the shelter, lying in the cat's bed. Why is Henry lying in the cats bed? Because from the second we brought that cat bed into the house, the cat has scoffed at it, questioning our sanity. "Why would you purchase that? I'll never lie down in that thing, not while there are drawers, cabinets, boxes, sinks or asses for me to lie on." That's what she says in that little Dumbass cat brain of hers. But when Henry decided he wanted to lie down in the cat bed, Dumbass would have none of it. Look at her tongue. She's obviously going to eat the dog for having the audacity to lie down on HER bed (that she's never used).
Yes, she IS a Dumbass and yes she DOES deserve her nickname. But she's our Dumbass and we wouldn't have her any other way.
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Everybody needs a break sometimes.....
I took this weekend off from the internet. Thursday was July 4 and I spent the evening with some awesome friends/fellow band parents, and when I got home, I read some of my book, Under the Dome. Friday, after running a hundred errands and working out, I took my girls to see One Direction at Hershey Park. I posted exactly one image to Facebook.
Saturday, I spent the day floating on the Potomac River with two of my very best girlfriends, Lisa and Susan. WHAT an amazingly relaxing time. Beer, pretzels and tons of laughter.
Sunday after working out, I sat on my butt and read another huge chunk of Under the Dome before going grocery shopping. Guess what I did Sunday night! If you said "get on the internet" you'd be wrong. I read even MORE of Under the Dome. I'm now more than 650 pages into this giant tome and am really enjoying it. I've gotten over the whole "nothing in the book matching what's in the mini-series" anger I had after the first episode. I ranted a little, I know, and I apologize to Mr. King. I've accepted the changes and have moved on.
I also happened to notice on Sunday that our house had become hell. While there was no fire and brimstone (only me, a short curly-haired version of Beelzebub), there was heat.
A hell of a lot of heat. It was 88 in the house. Our run capacitor shit the bed. And apparently, I'm the only person on earth who doesn't know what a run capacitor is. Everyone we spoke with said "Oh did your run capacitor die?" The only capacitor I am aware of is the flux capacitor from "Back to the Future". And while I didn't DRIVE 88, it was 88 degrees in our house, so I'm sure that has something to do with a flux capacitor. Whatever, it was hot.
So Monday I went back to work and right after work I had to go home and make some quick plans to get a replacement babysitter to take over for 13, who had come down with some nasty virus while babysitting, go buy ginger ale and pretzels for said sick kid, walk the neighbor's dog (the amazing and loveable Raleigh), and get 13 out of our hotter than hell house and over to Lisa's nice, cool, comfy air-conditioned house. 13 slept in the spare room for awhile and Lisa and I had dinner (LeanMoms.com meal plans are really tasty!!! She had the turkey and feta burger, I had the dijon chicken).
While we were at Lisa's, our neighbor Joe the Plumber (I'm not making that up, I swear) got his hands on a flux capacitor and drove the temperature down from 88 to a nice, cool 73. While he didn't drive up in a DeLorean, he DID make my house feel comfy.
By the time we got home from Lisa's, it was time to watch week 3 of Under the Dome. 13 and I went to bed after it was over and that was yet another day of no internet for me. No FB, no Twits. It was actually kind of nice not being connected to the computer. I actually enjoyed it. I may do that more often.
That doesn't mean I don't love you, you gorgeous snarklings, it just means real life got in the way and it didn't suck. Don't worry, I will never quit you.
 |
| 15, 13 and 30776 other 'Directioners' |
Saturday, I spent the day floating on the Potomac River with two of my very best girlfriends, Lisa and Susan. WHAT an amazingly relaxing time. Beer, pretzels and tons of laughter.
 | ||
| Me, an ice cold Shock Top, and Susan's right leg. Does it get any better than this? I think not. |
 |
| I'll never leave the river again. It's my new home. |
I also happened to notice on Sunday that our house had become hell. While there was no fire and brimstone (only me, a short curly-haired version of Beelzebub), there was heat.
 |
| Me, short, curly-haired Beelzebub. Like it? |
So Monday I went back to work and right after work I had to go home and make some quick plans to get a replacement babysitter to take over for 13, who had come down with some nasty virus while babysitting, go buy ginger ale and pretzels for said sick kid, walk the neighbor's dog (the amazing and loveable Raleigh), and get 13 out of our hotter than hell house and over to Lisa's nice, cool, comfy air-conditioned house. 13 slept in the spare room for awhile and Lisa and I had dinner (LeanMoms.com meal plans are really tasty!!! She had the turkey and feta burger, I had the dijon chicken).
While we were at Lisa's, our neighbor Joe the Plumber (I'm not making that up, I swear) got his hands on a flux capacitor and drove the temperature down from 88 to a nice, cool 73. While he didn't drive up in a DeLorean, he DID make my house feel comfy.
By the time we got home from Lisa's, it was time to watch week 3 of Under the Dome. 13 and I went to bed after it was over and that was yet another day of no internet for me. No FB, no Twits. It was actually kind of nice not being connected to the computer. I actually enjoyed it. I may do that more often.
That doesn't mean I don't love you, you gorgeous snarklings, it just means real life got in the way and it didn't suck. Don't worry, I will never quit you.
Friday, June 28, 2013
Interview with 13
Hard hitting questions, that's the key to good journalism. Get the story, get to the meat of the matter. That's just what I did when I grilled 13, using techniques such as Chinese water torture and waterboarding, I got the truth, and sometimes the truth hurts.
Ok that was a bit overly dramatic, but I did have fun reading her answers to some of the questions I gave her. I'd have posted 15's first but she hasn't finished them yet. She's too busy cleaning her room...
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Ok, now, on to the interview:
My questions are in blue. 13's answers are in fuschia (because I like that color)
What's the most fun family vacation we've ever taken, and why was it so fun?
Disney World, because it's fricking Disney World!! (what can I say, she's got excellent taste)
What's your favorite thing to do with your Mom, and why?
I love those heart to heart talks we have because it gets us time to better understand each other. (insert obligatory 'awwwwwww' here).
Same question regarding your dad?
I would say basketball, but I like talking to him about the future, because I get excited for those talks.
What is your idea of a great family night? What makes it great?
I think we need more family game nights. Those are really fun. I did that with Donovan and Simon's families and they were fun, so why not our family? (probably because we suck at time management, but whatever. We'll try)
What's your favorite thing about being you? What makes it so great?
I like being me because, NOT TO BRAG, TRYING HARD NOT TO, I have gotten an early start to the sports that I like so I am relatively decent at most sports I play. (she kicks ass, trust me) I do like being the captain of the team.
After you've died, if you could come back as anyone in the world, alive or dead, who would it be and why?
I kinda wanna come back as a military kid who moves around everywhere. If I ever have a problem, I'm moving soon anyway, it's whatever! And you never really have to get hooked on a place, you can just travel to new places all the time and be free. That would be really fun. (I found this answer to be extremely interesting, because she's never mentioned it before. Her friend Simon travels every few years so I think she may envy that. Grass is always greener, isn't it?)
Describe your relationship with your sister. What's your favorite thing? Least favorite thing? Why?
I like her. (thank God, because it's too late to return her) Her talks are really great for the most part (UNLESS SHE'S TEXTING WHILE I'M FRICKING TALKING!) But she really seems to know how to handle my problems. I don't like it when she thinks it's okay to harm me because I said or did something that she didn't like. It hurts me more than she realizes. AND ONE DAY I'M GONNA BE BIGGER SO SHE WON'T WANNA MESS WITH ME! (#truth)
What's your favorite thing to do with your friends?
Basketball (Simon) / Mario Party 7 (Hannah) (Indoor/outdoor friends, gotta love 'em!)
Tell me about your greatest childhood memory so far.
I will ALWAYS remember jazz season 2013. Getting to play for the Senators (in Washington DC) and going to Arts Alive (in Charleston, WV). That showed me that we were so much better than I thought we were. The small middle school practically out of the state made it big. We made it. (mom was pretty darn proud too!)
Ok that was a bit overly dramatic, but I did have fun reading her answers to some of the questions I gave her. I'd have posted 15's first but she hasn't finished them yet. She's too busy cleaning her room...
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Ok, now, on to the interview:
My questions are in blue. 13's answers are in fuschia (because I like that color)
What's the most fun family vacation we've ever taken, and why was it so fun?
Disney World, because it's fricking Disney World!! (what can I say, she's got excellent taste)
What's your favorite thing to do with your Mom, and why?
I love those heart to heart talks we have because it gets us time to better understand each other. (insert obligatory 'awwwwwww' here).
Same question regarding your dad?
I would say basketball, but I like talking to him about the future, because I get excited for those talks.
What is your idea of a great family night? What makes it great?
I think we need more family game nights. Those are really fun. I did that with Donovan and Simon's families and they were fun, so why not our family? (probably because we suck at time management, but whatever. We'll try)
What's your favorite thing about being you? What makes it so great?
I like being me because, NOT TO BRAG, TRYING HARD NOT TO, I have gotten an early start to the sports that I like so I am relatively decent at most sports I play. (she kicks ass, trust me) I do like being the captain of the team.
After you've died, if you could come back as anyone in the world, alive or dead, who would it be and why?
I kinda wanna come back as a military kid who moves around everywhere. If I ever have a problem, I'm moving soon anyway, it's whatever! And you never really have to get hooked on a place, you can just travel to new places all the time and be free. That would be really fun. (I found this answer to be extremely interesting, because she's never mentioned it before. Her friend Simon travels every few years so I think she may envy that. Grass is always greener, isn't it?)
Describe your relationship with your sister. What's your favorite thing? Least favorite thing? Why?
I like her. (thank God, because it's too late to return her) Her talks are really great for the most part (UNLESS SHE'S TEXTING WHILE I'M FRICKING TALKING!) But she really seems to know how to handle my problems. I don't like it when she thinks it's okay to harm me because I said or did something that she didn't like. It hurts me more than she realizes. AND ONE DAY I'M GONNA BE BIGGER SO SHE WON'T WANNA MESS WITH ME! (#truth)
What's your favorite thing to do with your friends?
Basketball (Simon) / Mario Party 7 (Hannah) (Indoor/outdoor friends, gotta love 'em!)
Tell me about your greatest childhood memory so far.
I will ALWAYS remember jazz season 2013. Getting to play for the Senators (in Washington DC) and going to Arts Alive (in Charleston, WV). That showed me that we were so much better than I thought we were. The small middle school practically out of the state made it big. We made it. (mom was pretty darn proud too!)
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Shopping with the Snarkfest Family
I took my friend Sio shopping last night. Sadly, we were also joined by 15 & 13 who, as you well know, have NO nice clothes to wear. Poor things. What kind of a mother am I that I consciously send my kids to school in sackcloth and ash? Burlap bags on their feet, dirty faces. They look like something out of Les Miserables, no? Poor pumpkins.
As usual, I digress. So we headed over to Kohls where all the cool kids go for clothes. Specifically, Sio and I were looking for dresses to wear to the local Rotary Ball tomorrow night. Yes, Cinderella, it's a ball. My first ball, and I needed something pretty to wear, just in case Prince Charming is there and wants to sweep me off my size 8 wides and take me to his palace on the beach of Maui. Oh, did I digress again? Sorry. We dropped 15 & 13 off in Juniors and headed over to find dresses for ourselves. Unsuccessfully. I DID, however, find some Spanx. Spanx rocks, my friend. ROCKS out LOUD!! If you haven't already done so, please go check out Frugalista's video tutorial on Spanx (after you finish reading this, of course). It's hysterical and she is AWESOME.
Dammit there's that digressing thing again! Focus, Snarkfest, focus!!
So I got my Spanks and a cute little shrug to wear over my go-to little black dress, and Sio got a lovely dress shirt for her hubby (at least HE'LL have something to wear to the ball) and we went on a store-wide quest to find my teens. They were right where we left them, in Juniors, still trying to decide, an hour later, on what they wanted to get. Each girl has to dress up on game days for their respective basketball games. They were given specific instructions. One outfit. ONE. Said outfit could be one top and one bottom, or one dress. Period. The end. 13 found a really cute cream colored dress, which coincidentally, is too short for her school standards because she is her father's daughter. She's 5'5" I think, which to me is tall. So of course she'll need tights. Or something. And 15 found a pretty top and a rubber band which she'll pretend is a skirt. It's like homecoming shopping all over again. That girl is 5'9" in flat shoes. Which, by the way, she is lacking. Shoes that is. Poor thing has no shoes that she could POSSIBLY wear with this top and rubber band pretend skirt. At that point, we schlepped over to the shoe section of Kohls and went on a 'Quest for cute shoes in a size 11'. 15's feet are smaller than 13's feet, so we can at least attempt to find shoes at Kohls that could fit 15. Sad to say, 13's feet are a women's 12. She's my little baby Sasquatch (a nickname sheloves OH SO MUCH hates with a passion) and I believe I have to travel far and wide across the lands to find shoes that fit her. DSW and Nordstrom Rack have both been suggested to me. But sadly, there are no DSW's or Nordstrom Racks anywhere close by. Sad face.
Stay with me here, I'm almost finished!
While we didn't even bother to look for size 12's for 13, she did try on this lovely red hat and managed to look absolutely adorable in the process:
And while we WERE in the shoe section, just for shits and giggles, 15 tried on a pair of high heeled boots which made her appear approximately 9 and a half feet tall. Especially when standing next to both Sio and myself, who are both under 5'2". I now present to you, my 15 year old daughter in her basketball practice shorts, cross country hoodie and a rocking pair of heeled sexy black boots:
After walking away from her and giving her the 'We're leaving in 2 minutes with or without you' speech, she headed back to the gigantic box from which the gigantic heels came and I pointed out the one other pair of shoes I saw in her size. Cute, flat brown boots. Poor 13. I fear that child will be wearing mens sneakers for the rest of her life. She'll be walking down the aisle in a pair of Reebok cross trainers. White, of course.
Anyway, after puttering around Kohls for far too long, we meandered up to the registers and, being the high maintenance shopper that I am, had to give the cashier a hard time. As the victim of repeated attempts at identity theft, I now have passwords on all of my credit cards. So when I go to Kohls, every single time I try to use my charge card, they have to call customer service and I have to get on the phone and give them my password in order for the sale to go through. Pain in the ass? You betcha. So we are at the cashier desk for a minimum of 15 minutes. By this time, I'm thinking Sio is mentally putting her house on the market and moving far away from me and my needy, crazy offspring. And I can't say that I blame her.
What started out as two friends going shopping for dresses turned into a scavenger hunt from hell. Sorry Sio. Maybe we'll try it again when my kids have graduated?
 |
| OMG I can't believe we have, like, no nice clothes to wear! |
Dammit there's that digressing thing again! Focus, Snarkfest, focus!!
So I got my Spanks and a cute little shrug to wear over my go-to little black dress, and Sio got a lovely dress shirt for her hubby (at least HE'LL have something to wear to the ball) and we went on a store-wide quest to find my teens. They were right where we left them, in Juniors, still trying to decide, an hour later, on what they wanted to get. Each girl has to dress up on game days for their respective basketball games. They were given specific instructions. One outfit. ONE. Said outfit could be one top and one bottom, or one dress. Period. The end. 13 found a really cute cream colored dress, which coincidentally, is too short for her school standards because she is her father's daughter. She's 5'5" I think, which to me is tall. So of course she'll need tights. Or something. And 15 found a pretty top and a rubber band which she'll pretend is a skirt. It's like homecoming shopping all over again. That girl is 5'9" in flat shoes. Which, by the way, she is lacking. Shoes that is. Poor thing has no shoes that she could POSSIBLY wear with this top and rubber band pretend skirt. At that point, we schlepped over to the shoe section of Kohls and went on a 'Quest for cute shoes in a size 11'. 15's feet are smaller than 13's feet, so we can at least attempt to find shoes at Kohls that could fit 15. Sad to say, 13's feet are a women's 12. She's my little baby Sasquatch (a nickname she
Stay with me here, I'm almost finished!
While we didn't even bother to look for size 12's for 13, she did try on this lovely red hat and managed to look absolutely adorable in the process:
 | ||
| 13: "I'm so, like, rocking this hat! Wait, is it on backwards?" |
 |
| Think coach'll let me play in these? |
Anyway, after puttering around Kohls for far too long, we meandered up to the registers and, being the high maintenance shopper that I am, had to give the cashier a hard time. As the victim of repeated attempts at identity theft, I now have passwords on all of my credit cards. So when I go to Kohls, every single time I try to use my charge card, they have to call customer service and I have to get on the phone and give them my password in order for the sale to go through. Pain in the ass? You betcha. So we are at the cashier desk for a minimum of 15 minutes. By this time, I'm thinking Sio is mentally putting her house on the market and moving far away from me and my needy, crazy offspring. And I can't say that I blame her.
What started out as two friends going shopping for dresses turned into a scavenger hunt from hell. Sorry Sio. Maybe we'll try it again when my kids have graduated?
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