Running and math don't mix.

I completed the Freedoms Run Marathon in record time!!! (for me)

My first marathon was the Marine Corps Marathon which I ran in 5:42:34. My average pace for that race was 13:03/mile. Pretty respectable for my first ever marathon.

My second marathon was the Disney Marathon and those of you who have been around awhile know that I ran the Goofy Challenge that year (Half Marathon Saturday, Full Marathon Sunday, lots of pain and suffering Monday) My time for that full marathon was something like 6:40 so that doesn't really count towards being a lickety split runner.  But I did kick ass during the half marathon with a time of 2:39:25 so I wasn't at all disappointed.

My finish time for the Freedoms Run was 5:40:22, a full 2 minutes and 12 seconds faster than my first full marathon. My average pace was 12:59/mile. I couldn't be happier about that than if Mike Rowe himself was waiting for me at the finish line to present me with my finisher's medal and a big wet sloppy kiss.

I had so much love and support that weekend, it was ridiculous. The morning started at 5:00 when I got up and dressed. My friend Susan was going to drive me to the shuttle bus to get to the starting line, but she feigned car trouble and instead told me she brought me another driver. Who should pop out from behind the car but my dear friend Jazzy Jen Powers, who came up from North Carolina just to cheer me on for my marathon. I cried when I finally realized who she was (in my defense, it was 5:30 a.m., pitch black outside and I was wearing sunglasses). She dropped me off at the shuttles with the promise of Pad Thai and wine that night, post-race. I can think of nothing better than good food and good friends to celebrate my victory.

The race started off with a little drizzle and about a mile in, it was a full on down-pour. It was during the second mile that I realized something. My washing machine is apparently not doing its job. The rinse cycle on my washer isn't getting all the detergent out of my clothes. How do I know this? Because I had, literally, a cuff of soap bubbles around each leg of my running capris from the downpour. I'm not kidding. I literally was leaving a trail of bubbles all over mile 2.

Luckily the rain eased up by mile 5, however, that's when I crossed the Potomac River and started running on the C&O Canal Towpath. The C&O that day resembled both Tough Mudder courses that I've run in the past. No lying, the towpath was nothing but 4" deep mud puddles as far as the eye can see. Normally, the towpath is one of my favorite places to run. Now, I don't care if I ever see it again. It was a muddy, slippery and dangerous mess.

At mile 15 I was able to get off the towpath and onto solid ground. That was the good news. The bad news is that at mile 15, the serious hills start, and they don't stop for another 6 miles. But more good news, my fake husband Joseph and one of my running sisters, Paula, met me at mile 15 and ran those hills with me. What a sweet blessed relief to be running with people I know and love, who were there to get me through the roughest part of the race!

My fake husband Joseph and I in the hills of Antietam Battlefield

We killed the hills of Antietam Battlefield and I was on track to PR this race after trying to do math in my head. Running and math don't mix. Just saying. Joseph left just before we left the Battlefield en route to Nutters for some ice cream while Paula and I trudged on. About 2 miles later, Paula had gotten her planned 8 miles in and she took her leave just as Joseph decided to join me again. Apparently, Nutters was closed, no ice cream for him, so what else could he do? He wanted me to PR and wanted to help make that happen.

It totally worked. I ran across that finish 2 minutes and 12 seconds faster than I did for my first full marathon. This time I was about 25 pounds heavier and 6 years older. And my family and friends were all waiting for me at that finish line. I cried as they ran the home stretch with me. PSA: running and crying are not possible at the same time, I ended up hyperventilating and nearly died.

Dear sweet baby Jesus can I stop running now??

My baby girl at the finish line, presenting me with a hug and my finishers medal

Me and the beautiful Jazzy Jen Powers who was with me at the start and the finish of my marathon

I could not have done this race without the love and support of my family, who I abandoned every Sunday from July through October for my long runs. Or Susan Reichel who biked alongside me through hill and dale, singing to me, threatening to hit me with her bike, making me coconut water concoctions that helped me survive the hot, treacherous hills of Maryland and West Virginia. Or Joseph Bertone and Paula Masters who got me through Antietam on a wet, cold October day. Or my running sister Lisa Kingsbury who is one of my biggest champions. If you sent a text, a call, a FB note, please know that your love and support meant the world to me.

The night I finished running, we did go for Pad Thai and wine, then spent the evening pretending to play cards but really gorged ourselves on more wine and chocolate (because my husband is amazing, he went to the store and bought all the chocolate he could find for us). And we laughed and talked well into the evening. It was an amazing weekend with wonderful friends and lots of pain. But all well worth it.

You can read about the events leading up to my full marathon here.

Snarkfest Runs a Marathon....

This Saturday morning I'll be up before the birds getting ready to run a marathon. This will be my 3rd marathon ever and I'm really excited about it. My first was the Marine Corps Marathon, and my second was part of the Goofy Challenge. For that, I ran a half marathon on Saturday and a full marathon on Sunday. Yeah, that was a little nuts. Or Goofy, as it were.

My bib and bling from the Goofy Challenge in 2012

But this weekend I'm running the Freedoms Run Full Marathon right here in my little town. The course runs through all sorts of historic places like the town of Harpers Ferry, the C&O Canal and the Antietam National Battlefield. These are all places I run almost daily, so it's literally like I'm running in my backyard. But for 26.2 miles. Hey it's a big backyard.

I'm totally ready. Hell, I'm almost looking forward to it. Almost.

I began training for this marathon in earnest back in mid-May. I've spent my mornings doing quick jaunts around my neighborhood and every Sunday has been consumed by double digit runs all through the summer. Most Sunday's I've been accompanied by one of my best friends (and the MOST excellent Sherpa) Susan. She has been riding her bike and carrying a backpack with a camel back, snacks and Ibuprofen to help me get through the long and mind-numbing miles. She has pushed me, mocked me, threatened me, sang to me and made me go farther and faster than I want to go. She assures me that I will thank her on race day. I'm sure after my suffering is over, I will do that.

My neighbor, the Nazi Crack Ho will be running the Half Marathon this year. I look forward to seeing her and her hubby, Sherpa Susan, my husband and favorite 16 year old daughter and many of my friends cheering me on at the finish line.

My goal is to finish in under 6 hours. The first 15 miles, from what I understand, is relatively flat so I should be able to average between 12-12:30/min mile. Once I hit those hills, I'll definitely be slowing down.

Wish me luck, Snarklings!

Hello...........It's me

The one who hasn't had an original idea since the early 80's.  When I was younger and free.

Okay I'll stop now. But seriously, the holidays have come and gone, as has my college freshman. We dropped her off this past weekend and now it's time to take down the decorations and put the holidays away for another year.

In other news, we've had this awful smell coming from the basement, and we're fairly certain that something died down there. The stench has slowly started to dissipate, thankfully, because I was this close to calling a priest to perform an exorcism down there. Because damn. The problem is that our basement is a catchall. Don't know what to do with something? Throw it in the basement, we'll deal with it later. And now the basement could pass for the latest episode of Hoarders.  So locating the offending odor has been difficult.

The world is mourning the loss of David Bowie today. One of my dear friends was a huge Bowie fan when I was in high school and I hold her responsible for helping to shape my musical tastes. I went to my very first concert with her at JFK Stadium in Philly where we saw Madness and The Police. This was in August of 1983. I blame her for making me a concert whore. She also took me to my first Duran Duran concert in March of 1984. So when we all heard the news of Bowie's passing, my thoughts went to her because she was such a fan.

What else is new? Oh yeah, I've started getting back to running and trying to get myself into a shape other than round. You'd be proud of me: Since the beginning of January I've run over 26 miles. I'll run the Marine Corps Historic Half Marathon in May like I do every year, but my running goal for 2016 is to run the Freedoms Run Full Marathon in October. That race is 16 miles of flat ground on the C&O Canal followed by about 5 miles of nothing but ugly ass hills. Good times.  But I totally need this goal because.... my ass.

I recently hosted Norine of Science of Parenthood for my annual Moms Night Out, only this time it was a book tour that brought the moms out. Norine and her writing partner Jessica are promoting their new book, which is very cool. I met these two funny ladies at BlogU14 where they were voted "Most Likely to get a Book Deal". And now they have a book deal! I'm hoping at this year's blogging conference, BlogU16 I'll be voted "Most Likely to be Hired as Mike Rowe's Close Personal Assistant". Hey, a girl can dream, right?

So now you're pretty much all caught upon what's been happening at Casa Snarkfest. Bear with me as I find my voice again. I'm sure it's there, it's probably just buried under boxes of Christmas decorations. Until then, Happy 2016 folks!

Real Heroes

UPDATING!!!! In honor of Sid preparing to run his 200th Full Marathon tomorrow, I'm reposting this because he's awesome....

Remember a few months back when I posted about how Hollywood is making stupid people famous for doing absolutely NOTHING? The post, Real Stars vs. Fake Stars was written about my friend Holly. Lots of you had lots of really nice things to say. I like writing posts like that, where attention is brought to someone who does good things for others, as opposed to doing nothing worthwhile for anyone but themselves.

Today I'm writing about a guy who is amazing, who does amazing things and seeks nothing in return. No glory, no press, no accolades. He does what he does simply because he wants to.

His name is Sid Busch. Sid is a runner, a marathoner, and to me, a hell of a guy. See, Sid doesn't just run half marathons and full marathons because he likes the bling. Now, I'll admit, the bling is cool. But Sid doesn't keep the bling for himself. Crazy, right? No, here's what Sid does. He runs in memory of a soldier or sailor who has been killed in action. He usually carries with him a picture of the person for whom he's running. And he carries an American flag for the entire race. When he crosses the finish line, he receives the medal for the race. But he doesn't keep the medal, instead he presents the medal to the fallen soldier or sailor's family. They sometimes travel to Arlington and place the medal on the soldier's headstone. This is one of the most selfless, compassionate things I've ever heard of.

Sid has run 199 FULL marathons. That's 5214 miles. Let that sit in your brain for a few minutes. That's the equivalent of running in a straight line from Atlantic City to San Francisco and back again. Mind = blown.

Photo courtesy: Robin Schmitt

I've run several half marathons with Sid, like the Marine Corps Historic Half and the Frederick Nut Job. And each time I run, I look forward to seeing Sid and giving him a high five or a fist bump. I've become Facebook friends with Sid and visit his Where's Sid? Facebook page each week to see what his next race will be. I sent him a message last week asking if he'd mind if I wrote about him on the old Snarkfest blog and he graciously agreed.

I asked. Sid answered.

Me: Where were you born?

Sid:  I was born and raised in Brooklyn, NY.

Me: You were in the Navy right?

Sid: I served in the Navy for 26 years. I was a Senior Chief Sonar Tech on subs.

Me: What kind of work do you do now? How do they feel about what you do? Are they flexible with your race schedule?

Sid: I work nights 4 days a week. I drive a truck for the Post and Courier and deliver the newspapers to the carriers so they can sort and deliver them. It's flexible so I can attend my races.


Me: Do you just run races in the eastern part of the country? How far have you traveled for races?


Sid: I drive now to races, saves money, and I can pack more than with flying. I have run all over the world. Furthest was ROTA RUA NEW ZEALAND

Photo courtesy: Keri Jacobs

Me: Do you have a favorite race to run?

Sid: I have a list of 5 favorites (including ties)

          Air Force and Marine Corps Marathons
          New York Marathon
          Baltimore Marathon
          Little Rock Marathon
          Disney World Marathon


Me: Do you remember your first marathon? Do you still have your first medal?


Sid: My first marathon was at the Hunter Army Air Field in Savannah, GA. It was 2 loops of the base. The medal was lost when I transferred.

         (editors note: I would LOVE to find out if it's possible to find the medal for this race!!!)

Me:  What's the reason that you do what you do?

Sid: WOW, this is a hard question. I do what I do because I have to do something more than pay lip service to those young men who have given the ultimate sacrifice to let me live in a free country. I want their families to know that their loss has not gone unnoticed.  I also do this to ease my guilt that I got too old to serve.

Photo courtesy: Sid's Facebook page

Me: What are the reactions you get from the families of those for whom you run?


Sid: The response is amazing. I have been adopted by these families, and have been treated like a member of the family.


I want to say 'Thank you' to Sid for taking the time to answer my questions, for allowing me to introduce him to you all and for doing what he does for those who can no longer run. Sid's not looking for attention, or praise. He's just a good guy doing his thing his way. And I'm proud to know him.

Photo courtesy: Sid's Facebook page

Thanks Sid, and for crying out loud, stay hydrated!

Snarkfest's Funky Running Playlist

I've been running a lot more lately to get this weight off (again) and thought I'd share with you, my dear Snarklings, my running playlist. I've got the strangest taste in music, and I'm sure after reading this list, you'll be all like, "WTF, Snarky? Who the hell listens to that anymore??" Well me, that's who. Prepare to....
scratch your head and wonder what the hell I'm thinking when you see my playlist.

Bad Romance - Lady Gaga  I remember doing a Zumba routine to this song when I went to Zumba with Aaron at our gym. Trust me, I don't break out into my Zumba routine when I'm running. You're welcome, running partners.

Dance With Me Tonight - Olly Murs  It's a fun, upbeat song. I like fun, upbeat when I run.

Everybody Dance Now - C&C Music Factory  I LOVE me some 90's dance tunes. And when I hear it, I speed up just thinking about Vince Vaughn doing the choreographed routine in Old School to this song.

Lose Yourself - Eminem  Nothing gets me more pumped than this song when I start out running. And yes, when I hear this, I rap right along with Em. (I call him Em, we're close like that)

I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho) - Pitbull  Another great song from Zumba with Aaron. THIS is one I always want to stop running and start Zumba'ing to, but for the sake of everyone else I'm running with, I don't. Again, you're welcome.

Word Up - Cameo  Oh how I love this song. I used to have it as my ringtone but I got tired of just hearing the first few seconds of it. Momma, come on baby tell me what's the word, the word up!

Turn This Mutha Out - MC Hammer   Don't be dissing the Hammer. You know if this song was playing right now, you'd be jamming.

Til I Forget About You - Big Time Rush  Don't hate me, I've got teens, it's their fault, they got me hooked.

Sir Duke - Stevie Wonder  IMO, one of the best Stevie Wonder songs EVER. I play a mean air trumpet ESPECIALLY when I'm running!

Rappers Delight - Sugar Hill Gang  Shut up, I love them

Night Boat to Cairo - Madness  I'm a HUGE Madness fan and this song always gets me moving fast, probably because it's a really peppy song

Jump Around - House of Pain  I'm telling you, I dig this song so hard. I look forward to this song coming on every time I run and when I do, I'm a happy running fool. Jump up, jump up and get down.

Iko Iko - The Belle Stars  I liked Rain Man, you got a problem with that??

White Horse - Laid Back  If you wanna be rich, you got to be a bitch. This song is an instant classic.

Supersonic - J.J. Fad   How can you not smile when you hear the 3 chicks beat-boxing??

Shock the Monkey - Peter Gabriel  Come on, this song. Hard driving beat, drums thumping, monkeys falling out of trees. It's got everything.

Apache - Sugar Hill Gang  See Rappers Delight, repeat

Baby Got Back - Sir Mix-A-Lot  Shut up, you know you love this one. Admit it, when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face you get sprung

Bye Bye Bye - N'Sync  Justin Timberlake before he had to go and bring sexy back. And those other 4 guys who sang with him. I have to fight the urge to jump on the down beats

The Final Countdown - Europe  CRAZY good song. EPIC song. The opening synth is so hot it gets my blood pumping, which really does help with a long run

Thrift Shop - Macklemore  What what, what what? No, these are NOT my grandad's clothes. The sax on this song makes me happy, and when I'm happy, I run faster

Live Like We're Young - One Direction  See Til I Forget About You (it's those kids!!)

It Takes Two - Rob Base & DJ Easy Rock  Have you figured out yet that I'm a huge fan of the late 80's and 90's dance stuff? Cuz this shit's da bomb when I'm slowing down, tired and in need of a boost.

Gotta Keep Them Separated - The Offspring  This is the story of my two darling kids. And it's got a fast beat, which helps

Far From Over - Frank Stallone  Give me any shit about this song and I'll have his brother Sylvester beat you up. This is a good motivating song when you're tired. SAVE ME DARLING! I am down but I am far from over!!

Blame the Machines - Duran Duran  You knew you couldn't get away without at least one Duran Duran song on my list, didn't you? This is from their last album and has a great, fast beat

Everybody Walk the Dinosaur - Was Not Was  Yes. Yes I like this song. I like it very much.

Headstrong - Trapt  I like a good headbanging song every so often. Makes me appreciate the dance tunes that much more when they come on.

I Wanna Be Sedated - The Ramones  Bah bah bah bah, bah bah bah bah bah, I wish this run was over

Planet Rock - Afrika Bambaataa & The Soulsonic Force  This, IMO, is the ULTIMATE 80's song, I've always loved it and I always will love it and if it doesn't come on while I'm running, I put it on when I'm cooling down. That's how much I love it

So there you have it, Snarklings. That is just a handful of the plethora of songs I have on my phone that I enjoy listening to when I run. Some of them you may like, some you may hate, some you may not have ever heard before, but they are all mine and I love 'em all.

What are YOUR running songs? Workout songs? Zumba songs? Lying on the couch eating Oreos songs?

Thoughts from running in the rain...

So I went for a nice, long run yesterday afternoon. It was 46 degrees, rainy and cold. The whole time. When I finished my run, I couldn't feel my hands, but my head was clear, and I thought about a million things in those 2+ hours that I spent alone in the cold and rain.

I left with one specific goal in mind: I needed to tackle a hill. You see, I'm running the Freedoms Run Half Marathon this Saturday here in Shepherdstown, and it's second only to the Cincinnati Flying Pig half marathon when it comes to hills. I'm not sure how, but the Pig is 11 miles up hill, and 2 miles down. Don't ask me, I don't know how they work that, I just know I've done it twice and that was enough for me. No, the Freedoms Run is not as bad as Cincy, but it's a rough one. And the last hill I actually tackled was during the Tough Mudder last month in Frederick, MD. And by hill, I mean a wall of hay bales that I had to climb over. So I had some work to do. Luckily, it was just me, some cows and my thoughts.

I ran along the C & O Canal for a little over a mile and a half and as I approached the main hill that I wanted to tackle, Miller's Sawmill Road, I began to think about how lucky I am. I have some amazing friends. As I started up the beast that is Sawmill, I thought back to Friday night, traveling up to Philly and visiting with my best friend Mandie. We talk every day, but see each other far less than that. We were pregnant with out first babies together, and they were born 5 weeks apart. We lived together for awhile before there were husbands or kids in the picture, just cats. And we've remained close for years. I don't see her nearly enough but in our hearts, we know how much we love each other. And the thought of that love for my best friend got me to the top of Sawmill. And I felt so good, I decided to keep running, rather than turn back around and descend that hill.

Photo courtesy: Wunderground.com

On I ran, into the Antietam National Battlefield. As I chugged along THOSE hills, I thought about how I spent Saturday. The girls and I left Mandie's and went to visit with my brother, whom I have always looked up to and admired. My girls adore my brother and his family and it was great to see them again. From there, we headed down to Atlantic City to see my mom. Mom is in her 70's now and suffering from COPD (Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease). Mom used to be very active and was always running here or there. She hated driving and pretty much gave it up when I got my drivers license. No, mom always like walking places. If she had errands to run, she'd grab her pocketbook and head out on foot to wherever the day took her. Sadly, these days, she rarely ventures outside. Walking into the kitchen to make a pot of coffee leaves her struggling to catch her breath and she is on pretty much constant oxygen now. And as I ran the hills at Antietam Battlefield, I thought about how lucky I am that I've got strong legs to carry me over those hills and strong lungs to allow me to run, unencumbered, by bronchial issues. My heart breaks for my mom because she hates being cooped up AND baseball season is over for her beloved Phillies. So she pretty much stays in her apartment resting in her retirement, unable to really run around like she used to. And as I hit mile 7 yesterday, I finished up the last hill in the battlefield and headed back toward Sawmill, feeling great and happy that I'm healthy enough now to complete such an undertaking, when I know my mom would never again even be able to walk those hills. Not with her walker, not with an oxygen tank. Not ever.

It was so hard to leave my mom on Sunday because it's so hard to get back to see her with 15 & 12's sports and activity schedule, but looking back now, I know we need to get back more often, because I don't know how many more visits there will be. And as we left her apartment building, I cried. I cried because I miss my mom and it gets harder and harder to leave her with each visit. And as I ran down Sawmill, trying to feel my thumbs, and trying to keep from rolling down like a giant bowling ball, I laughed at myself for being such an emotional goof. And I promised myself that I will call my mom everyday, just like I used to when I lived back in Jersey.

And once I arrived at the bottom of the beast, I had about a mile and a half to finish on the Canal before I could be warm and dry in the comfort of my car. While I ran that last bit, I thought of how we spent Sunday night, in the company of our old neighbors. Our warm, caring old neighbors, with whom we'd spent countless days and nights, sitting on their back deck, drinking wine or beer, while the kids drank juices and bounced on the trampoline. Their boys and my girls were like siblings and spent so much time together. It was so hard to say goodbye to them when we left, and as I walked in their front door and hugged Fran, I forgot how much I loved her and how much I had missed her, and again, I cried. And as I finished up mile 11 yesterday, I smiled at how hard we laughed and how it felt as though I had never left. We picked right back up, chatting and laughing while the kids talked and played chess and walked to the store for us. We ate pizza and drank coffee and caught up. And I loved it.

We had a fantastic trip back 'home' to visit family and friends, and then came back to West Virginia to our new family and friends, and I got to enjoy the best of them both as I ran my 11 miles yesterday. I am so lucky to have so many wonderful people in my life, and I am so thankful for what I have. The run really helped clear out the cobwebs, and I'm grateful that I have the ability to run, because not everyone does.