Showing posts with label Homecoming. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Homecoming. Show all posts
Thursday, November 6, 2014
Guesting over at Ten to Twenty Parenting
Remember that Homecoming dress nightmare from a few years back? That story is up on Ten to Twenty Parenting! Please go over and read the story and feel free to leave a comment. It may just be new to you!
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Snarkfest's Top 5 Blog Posts of 2012
Since I've seen a bunch of other bloggers doing this, and since I'm a newbie to all of this, I figure it must be cool to come up with an end of the year list of one's most widely read blog posts of 2012, right? And far be it for me to not hang out with the cool kids. I'm all about cool. Does anyone even SAY cool these days? I don't know. But I do know that you guys really seemed to enjoy my ride on the Character Assassination Carousel from Ninja Mom, where I skewered We're Going on a Bear Hunt. You guys also seemed to enjoy reading my take on Positive Panties. I'll let you guys read the list yourselves and if you know someone who could use a good laugh, or a pair of Positive Panties, share this blog with them. And thanks for your support. Hopefully 2013 will be full of laughs, sarcasm and heavy doses of snark!! So now without further ado, from the home office in Terre Haute, Indiana, here are the top 5 blog posts from Snarkfest this year:
5. My Apologies? Not So Fast.......
4. Your Pet Hates You
3. Homecoming Dress (A Mother's Nightmare)
2. Positive Panties
1. We're Going on a Bear Hunt
Thanks to everyone for sticking with me! Y'all are awesome. And those of you who know me, know I never say y'all. So y'all must be pretty special.
5. My Apologies? Not So Fast.......
4. Your Pet Hates You
3. Homecoming Dress (A Mother's Nightmare)
2. Positive Panties
1. We're Going on a Bear Hunt
Thanks to everyone for sticking with me! Y'all are awesome. And those of you who know me, know I never say y'all. So y'all must be pretty special.
Friday, September 28, 2012
Crazy Busy Weekend!
Homecoming weekend. Here it is, at long last. 15 is lucky to have made it all week without missing the bus once. We picked up her dress last night and got a bitchin' pair of heels and an adorable little clutch to go with the heels. In these heels she's officially 'an assload' taller than I am. I promise an update tomorrow night when I get the pictures of her all dressed up and ready to go.
In the mean time, tonight is the Homecoming football game. And since 15 is in the band, she's performing during the game. And since the band boosters run the concession stand, and I'm a band booster, I'll be slinging nachos and cheese, hotdogs and popcorn all evening. It's a fantastic program where we earn money for the band and some of the proceeds that the concession stand earns goes into an account for each child of a parent who volunteers to work the stand. I try to sign up and work concessions whenever I am free (no volleyball, no late evening practices, etc) and last year I did end up with a halfway decent amount in 15's account which helped offset the cost of her stay at band camp this summer (stop now. No American Pie jokes. This is my daughter we're talking about. And besides, she doesn't even play the flute).
Anyway I digress (you see that happening a lot with me, don't you?). I'll be working concessions while 15 is out marching and playing. The stand is actually a lot of fun. One of my favorite people to work with is Keith Stone, who is so smooth. She knows who she is. But getting back to the band, this band is fantastic. I mean truly a talented and amazing group of kids. I'm so pleased to be associated with them. They were even invited to march in the annual Cherry Blossom Festival parade in Washington, DC this coming April. They are only one of a handful of bands from across the country invited to march in this parade so we're all pretty freaking stoked.
So that's tonight.
Tomorrow 15's got a cross country meet and we've got our community yard sale. Perfect excuse to dig out all the shit we've got piled up in the basement and sell it to somepoor unsuspecting schmuck sweet, kind folks. Better in their basement than mine. Then I'm getting a haircut at 1:00. THEN we've got a chicken barbeque dinner to benefit our University's womens basketball team. We love those girls and they have been so sweet and kind to my daughters that we like to try to help them out whenever we can.
After we eat our bbq, it's time to get 15 ready for Homecoming, which means she gets her shower, puts on her pretty $29.99 dress that cost me $127 (don't forget the shoes and the clutch!!) and she gets to go to her dance because she did NOT miss the bus this week.
Now we move on to Sunday after a good night's sleep on Saturday night. Sunday the girls have RE (religious education for you non-church-goers). Don't feel left out, I'm not a church-goer myself but sometimes you do what will please the grandparents AND appease the children. THEN I'm going for a nice run with my friend Shrek. I am her Donkey. It's a win-win. Shrek and Donkey jogging along. No better way to spend a Sunday morning.
Sunday afternoon we've got basket bingo, once again to benefit those awesome women who play basketball for our University. Sunday evening will be topped off with a youth mass and pot luck dinner for all the kids who are planning to make their confirmation (15 & 12 are included in that lot). Sunday, after I get home, kick off my shoes and sit on the couch, I plan on popping open a nice bottle of red and maybe trying to get to the bottom of it.
I've told you about my weekend plans. Now, what have YOU got going on this weekend? Last weekend of yard work? Golfing? Bowling? Are YOU yard-sale-ing? Wanna come to my house and buy myjunk awesome stuff??
In the mean time, tonight is the Homecoming football game. And since 15 is in the band, she's performing during the game. And since the band boosters run the concession stand, and I'm a band booster, I'll be slinging nachos and cheese, hotdogs and popcorn all evening. It's a fantastic program where we earn money for the band and some of the proceeds that the concession stand earns goes into an account for each child of a parent who volunteers to work the stand. I try to sign up and work concessions whenever I am free (no volleyball, no late evening practices, etc) and last year I did end up with a halfway decent amount in 15's account which helped offset the cost of her stay at band camp this summer (stop now. No American Pie jokes. This is my daughter we're talking about. And besides, she doesn't even play the flute).
Anyway I digress (you see that happening a lot with me, don't you?). I'll be working concessions while 15 is out marching and playing. The stand is actually a lot of fun. One of my favorite people to work with is Keith Stone, who is so smooth. She knows who she is. But getting back to the band, this band is fantastic. I mean truly a talented and amazing group of kids. I'm so pleased to be associated with them. They were even invited to march in the annual Cherry Blossom Festival parade in Washington, DC this coming April. They are only one of a handful of bands from across the country invited to march in this parade so we're all pretty freaking stoked.
So that's tonight.
Tomorrow 15's got a cross country meet and we've got our community yard sale. Perfect excuse to dig out all the shit we've got piled up in the basement and sell it to some
After we eat our bbq, it's time to get 15 ready for Homecoming, which means she gets her shower, puts on her pretty $29.99 dress that cost me $127 (don't forget the shoes and the clutch!!) and she gets to go to her dance because she did NOT miss the bus this week.
Now we move on to Sunday after a good night's sleep on Saturday night. Sunday the girls have RE (religious education for you non-church-goers). Don't feel left out, I'm not a church-goer myself but sometimes you do what will please the grandparents AND appease the children. THEN I'm going for a nice run with my friend Shrek. I am her Donkey. It's a win-win. Shrek and Donkey jogging along. No better way to spend a Sunday morning.
Sunday afternoon we've got basket bingo, once again to benefit those awesome women who play basketball for our University. Sunday evening will be topped off with a youth mass and pot luck dinner for all the kids who are planning to make their confirmation (15 & 12 are included in that lot). Sunday, after I get home, kick off my shoes and sit on the couch, I plan on popping open a nice bottle of red and maybe trying to get to the bottom of it.
I've told you about my weekend plans. Now, what have YOU got going on this weekend? Last weekend of yard work? Golfing? Bowling? Are YOU yard-sale-ing? Wanna come to my house and buy my
Monday, September 24, 2012
Homecoming Dress (a Mother's Nightmare)
I love 15. I truly do. And I trust her to make good choices as she grows. She's a great kid, she's smart, she's funny as hell, she's drop dead gorgeous and to paraphrase her favorite boy band, One Delusion (or something like that) she doesn't know she's beautiful. (here's where I wait for her to read and correct me)
Anyway, that being said, she went shopping on Friday night with two girlfriends for dresses for Homecoming which is next Saturday. I had plans with the moms in my 'hood, and her dad was working, so one of the girls' moms took them out to the mall. 15 had said that this mom would be fine with paying for a dress for 15 if I wanted her to, and I could just pay her back. While it was a really nice and very generous offer, I politely declined, telling 15 that if she did find a dress, put it aside or ask them to hold it and I would take her back up Saturday and buy it. OR she could take her own birthday money and use it to buy a dress. She took her money and off they went.
Fast forward to about 8:00 that night. I was well into a bottle of wine, having fun with the moms, playing Pokeno and enjoying a moms night out. 15 sent me a picture text, but nothing came through. I texted her back and she said "Did you see it?" Seeing nothing but a big white screen on my phone I texted back that I didn't see it. So she called me and told me that she had tried on this 'really pretty cream colored dress and it was only $34 and she could buy it herself and it was really pretty and can I get it?' After a little more discussion, and knowing that it would save me the trouble of driving up the next day to buy it, I agreed. She of course gave me the standard: "Thank you! I love you mommy!" schpeal and hung up. Several minutes later, the picture came through. I nearly died.
While I do have a foul mouth at times, I'm not a big proponent of posting pictures of scantily clad women on my blog. And ESPECIALLY not pictures of those to whom I've given birth. So you can imagine my shock and awe when I saw that this dress looked like, in my husband's words: a scrunchy. It WAS in fact cream colored, flesh colored to be more precise. Strapless. Form fitting (read: TIGHT) and about 6 inches too short. This was the conversation, verbatim that I had with 15 after the picture came through and I had sufficiently lost my mind:
Me: Did you already buy it?
4 seconds go by without a reply
Me: DID YOU ALREADY BUY IT???????
15: Yes I did
Me: Save the receipt, don't dare take the tags off!!!
I got home from moms night out and when I went into 15's room she was already asleep. I looked at the dress hanging innocently in her closet and threw up. This thing looked like an ace bandage, only smaller. If I let her wear this dress this year, next year's dress would very likely be down to bandaids on her nips and possibly a fig leaf (optional, I'm sure) Do you know WHY this dress was only $34 at Macy's??? Because even the hookers knew it was too small and too tight.
Don't go getting all up in my grill about my comparison of my 15 year old to a hooker, because that's not what I'm saying at all. I'm saying her choice of homecoming dresses just needed some guidance. When I asked if her friend's mom had seen the dress, she replied that no, the mom had not. Saturday 15 had an away cross country met and then we had a houseful of kids Saturday evening, so I never actually got to talk with her about her clothing choices. However, Sunday morning, we discussed it. Or more accurately, I asked her to put the dress on so that I could see it in person. Maybe the picture didn't do it justice. Maybe it looked better on her in person. Maybe my dogs would develop the ability to calculate nuclear physics too.
When she came downstairs with this dress on, my jaw hit the floor. Yes, she's drop dead gorgeous. Yes, she has a great figure. But NO way in HELL was she wearing this rubber band to Homecoming. So I explained in my most soothing, caring, loving mom voice that she is a beautiful girl but that dress sends the wrong message. I know she's a decent kid, I know she's got morals and isn't loose or trampy, but that dress says otherwise. Yes, all of her friends know her and know she's not a tramp but what about those who DON'T know her? Will they be quick to judge? And while I do teach my kids that it doesn't matter what others think of you, as long as you know in your heart that you're a good person, I had to be a hypocrite this one time and rule a big HELL NO to this particular item of clothing. So sue me.
So Sunday afternoon, 15, her bestie M, hubby and I headed back up to Macy's to return the scrunchy. We then went to every single store in the mall in search of a more appropriate dress for homecoming. And we came up completely empty handed. Deb, Charlotte Russe, Penney's, you name it we searched it and found nothing that 15 liked. Leaving the mall, I was sweating, my heart was pounding, and I'm thinking, great now she's going to have to wear last year's dress again and she'll be in therapy for years and write a tell-all book about what a rotten and judgemental mother I am. But there was one option, and while I wasn't IN LOVE with it, it WAS an option.
David's Bridal. There was one right across from the mall and I thought, other than an assload of cash, what have we got to lose by taking a look. Our lovely bridal shopping consultant, Fey, picked a bunch of pretty dresses for 15 to try on. And BAM! After an hour and 10 minutes and 42 dresses, we had a winner. It is a really gorgeous royal blue, somewhat form-fitting but not hookerish dress. The price was marked down from $99 to $59. Okay I can live with $59. Except that it was a scad too loose at the top and 15's girls would be making surprise appearances all night if we didn't get it altered. So Fey took us back to alterations where we met the lovely Michelle, who was sweet and kind and told us that the alterations would be $50, PLUS $15 because of the extra material that had to be cut off the top of the dress. Oh and PLUS $25 because it was a rush job (alterations usually allow for 2 weeks, we only had one week, so BAM, another $25). I must admit that the dress is beautiful, 15 is a knock out in it, and it covers more of her body than the damn paper towel that we returned to Macy's, so I said 'Okay, let's do it' which got the standard "Thank you mommy, I love you" from 15.
Last surprise. When we finally made it to the register to pay, Michelle rang up the alterations ($90) and when she scanned the price tag for the dress, it came up $29 NOT $59. BONUS! So the alterations were 3 times the price of the dress. But the dress, all told, came to $127, and to me, that's well worth the cost of having 15's girls and her hoo haa covered up. I'll put up a picture on the day of the dance.
Anyway, that being said, she went shopping on Friday night with two girlfriends for dresses for Homecoming which is next Saturday. I had plans with the moms in my 'hood, and her dad was working, so one of the girls' moms took them out to the mall. 15 had said that this mom would be fine with paying for a dress for 15 if I wanted her to, and I could just pay her back. While it was a really nice and very generous offer, I politely declined, telling 15 that if she did find a dress, put it aside or ask them to hold it and I would take her back up Saturday and buy it. OR she could take her own birthday money and use it to buy a dress. She took her money and off they went.
Fast forward to about 8:00 that night. I was well into a bottle of wine, having fun with the moms, playing Pokeno and enjoying a moms night out. 15 sent me a picture text, but nothing came through. I texted her back and she said "Did you see it?" Seeing nothing but a big white screen on my phone I texted back that I didn't see it. So she called me and told me that she had tried on this 'really pretty cream colored dress and it was only $34 and she could buy it herself and it was really pretty and can I get it?' After a little more discussion, and knowing that it would save me the trouble of driving up the next day to buy it, I agreed. She of course gave me the standard: "Thank you! I love you mommy!" schpeal and hung up. Several minutes later, the picture came through. I nearly died.
While I do have a foul mouth at times, I'm not a big proponent of posting pictures of scantily clad women on my blog. And ESPECIALLY not pictures of those to whom I've given birth. So you can imagine my shock and awe when I saw that this dress looked like, in my husband's words: a scrunchy. It WAS in fact cream colored, flesh colored to be more precise. Strapless. Form fitting (read: TIGHT) and about 6 inches too short. This was the conversation, verbatim that I had with 15 after the picture came through and I had sufficiently lost my mind:
Me: Did you already buy it?
4 seconds go by without a reply
Me: DID YOU ALREADY BUY IT???????
15: Yes I did
Me: Save the receipt, don't dare take the tags off!!!
I got home from moms night out and when I went into 15's room she was already asleep. I looked at the dress hanging innocently in her closet and threw up. This thing looked like an ace bandage, only smaller. If I let her wear this dress this year, next year's dress would very likely be down to bandaids on her nips and possibly a fig leaf (optional, I'm sure) Do you know WHY this dress was only $34 at Macy's??? Because even the hookers knew it was too small and too tight.
Don't go getting all up in my grill about my comparison of my 15 year old to a hooker, because that's not what I'm saying at all. I'm saying her choice of homecoming dresses just needed some guidance. When I asked if her friend's mom had seen the dress, she replied that no, the mom had not. Saturday 15 had an away cross country met and then we had a houseful of kids Saturday evening, so I never actually got to talk with her about her clothing choices. However, Sunday morning, we discussed it. Or more accurately, I asked her to put the dress on so that I could see it in person. Maybe the picture didn't do it justice. Maybe it looked better on her in person. Maybe my dogs would develop the ability to calculate nuclear physics too.
When she came downstairs with this dress on, my jaw hit the floor. Yes, she's drop dead gorgeous. Yes, she has a great figure. But NO way in HELL was she wearing this rubber band to Homecoming. So I explained in my most soothing, caring, loving mom voice that she is a beautiful girl but that dress sends the wrong message. I know she's a decent kid, I know she's got morals and isn't loose or trampy, but that dress says otherwise. Yes, all of her friends know her and know she's not a tramp but what about those who DON'T know her? Will they be quick to judge? And while I do teach my kids that it doesn't matter what others think of you, as long as you know in your heart that you're a good person, I had to be a hypocrite this one time and rule a big HELL NO to this particular item of clothing. So sue me.
So Sunday afternoon, 15, her bestie M, hubby and I headed back up to Macy's to return the scrunchy. We then went to every single store in the mall in search of a more appropriate dress for homecoming. And we came up completely empty handed. Deb, Charlotte Russe, Penney's, you name it we searched it and found nothing that 15 liked. Leaving the mall, I was sweating, my heart was pounding, and I'm thinking, great now she's going to have to wear last year's dress again and she'll be in therapy for years and write a tell-all book about what a rotten and judgemental mother I am. But there was one option, and while I wasn't IN LOVE with it, it WAS an option.
David's Bridal. There was one right across from the mall and I thought, other than an assload of cash, what have we got to lose by taking a look. Our lovely bridal shopping consultant, Fey, picked a bunch of pretty dresses for 15 to try on. And BAM! After an hour and 10 minutes and 42 dresses, we had a winner. It is a really gorgeous royal blue, somewhat form-fitting but not hookerish dress. The price was marked down from $99 to $59. Okay I can live with $59. Except that it was a scad too loose at the top and 15's girls would be making surprise appearances all night if we didn't get it altered. So Fey took us back to alterations where we met the lovely Michelle, who was sweet and kind and told us that the alterations would be $50, PLUS $15 because of the extra material that had to be cut off the top of the dress. Oh and PLUS $25 because it was a rush job (alterations usually allow for 2 weeks, we only had one week, so BAM, another $25). I must admit that the dress is beautiful, 15 is a knock out in it, and it covers more of her body than the damn paper towel that we returned to Macy's, so I said 'Okay, let's do it' which got the standard "Thank you mommy, I love you" from 15.
Last surprise. When we finally made it to the register to pay, Michelle rang up the alterations ($90) and when she scanned the price tag for the dress, it came up $29 NOT $59. BONUS! So the alterations were 3 times the price of the dress. But the dress, all told, came to $127, and to me, that's well worth the cost of having 15's girls and her hoo haa covered up. I'll put up a picture on the day of the dance.
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