I used to know where my stuff was....

I went looking for my makeup removing towelettes this morning. Couldn't find them. Why? Because I have teenagers. This got me thinking about how things have definitely changed since my babies turned into teens. For instance, I remember when I used to be able to go into my makeup bag, locate my eyeliner, put on that eyeliner and then put it back in my makeup bag. Now I can't find my makeup bag. Because, teens.

And when I look in that 10x magnifying mirror at all the dark hair crawling around over my eyes like a caterpillar moving across my forehead, I mourn the loss of my tweezers, which have disappeared into the abyss that is the girls bathroom in my house. Those girls, however, have PERFECTLY coiffed eyebrows. Thanks to my tweezers. Wherever they are.

Their nails are perfectly clipped, thanks to my nail clippers. Which I haven't seen in weeks. MY toenails are practically clawing at the ground when I walk because they've gotten so long. But in order to clip them, someone would have to locate my nail clippers. Naturally, NO ONE knows where they are because apparently I'M the only one in the house that uses them. Their nails are perfectly clipped, but I'M the only one who uses the nail clippers. Whatever.

Scissors? Tape? I buy them new every Christmas. Why? Teens.

I don't bother painting my nails anymore, because why bother? My nail polish remover and cotton balls have mysteriously vanished into thin air. Naturally, no one has seen them. My husband takes pleasure in helping me out by telling me that he never uses the stuff. Thanks honey, you're a huge help.

Stuff my husband doesn't use. Just so you know.

I've taken to hiding things that I just refuse to have stolen part with. My deodorant is now in my sock drawer. Shampoo and conditioner? I hide those in my closet under my shoe rack and take them in when I shower each day. Razor? Underwear drawer. Shaving cream? The garage, where else??

One good thing about being shorter and heavier than my girls: they don't steal my pants. Oh sure, back a few years ago when 17 was a freshman and I was 30 lbs lighter, I attended her band concert and asked my husband what pants she had on (I could see her white socks like she was Michael Jackson without the glove) and he told me they were mine. She was wearing my size 6 pants. Sure she was too tall for them (hence the white socks showing) but they fit her. See? Maybe there IS an upside to being short and heavy. That's my new story and I'm sticking with it. So pass me another donut.

Yep, I remember back when I could find things, like money in my wallet, food in my pantry, quiet in my house and the ever-important thing to find: my sanity. But alas, those days are gone. They've been replaced by teenagers.
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Is it wrong?

Is it wrong that I can't wait until basketball season is over? Is it wrong that I CAN wait until track season starts? I believe we may actually have about 2, maybe 3 weeks from the time the buzzer signals the end of the last basketball game until the first day of track tryouts. And naturally, because I birthed two athletic babies, they have to tryout. 15 is a hurdler and 13 runs the 400 and throws shot and discus. I drive. A lot.  With my husband's daily commute, the onus is on me to get everyone from point A to point B while holding down a full time job. My favorite thing (not) to hear is "Why weren't you here to watch me??" Is it wrong that I just can't do it all? Don't get me wrong. In an absolutely perfect world I'd be at every meet, every race, every game. But sadly, it's not a perfect world.

I LOVE watching my kids play, compete, perform, etc. If I had the means and the ability, I'd be there every single time. But it's just not possible. I just can't be there for every single event. Jesus, I have no idea HOW people with more than 2 kids do it! At the beginning of each season, I love seeing the excited look on their faces, the newness, the anticipation of diving head first into the sport. But by the last full week of games, it is I who cannot wait for it all to be over. I sigh the biggest sigh of relief that it's over and I can relax (temporarily) because that was the last thing on the schedule (for now).

Is that wrong? Is it wrong that I just am tickled at the idea of driving home from work and NOT having to go back out to pick one up from practice or rush home to feed the dogs before heading back out into the night to another game? I am so psyched at the idea of actually sitting down to a family dinner in the evening, one where all four of us are at the table! And no one has to rush out for anything (other than maybe ice cream from the store, I'm always excited about ice cream).

I'm sure some mom, somewhere, will read this and think: "I just want my children to be happy and I'm more than willing to bend over backwards to make them that way." That mother is obviously a crack whore with no concept of reality. Because the reality of it is, yes, we ALL want the best for our children, but at what price? We have a sit down meal where we are all at the table, probably twice a month. Three times if we're lucky. The rest of the month, we're running around, practice here, game here, sleepover there, party over yonder. Is this what I had in mind when I thought about having kids? No flipping way.

Would I trade it for all the chocolate at Hershey? Not for a second. I love my kids and I love that they are active and I'm so blessed that they are healthy and able. They stay busy and for the most part, they stay out of trouble. And while it's a pain in the butt being responsible for juggling their schedules, I wouldn't give it up for anything. Yes, I'll kvetch about how hard it is and how tired I am. But in the end, it is worth it.

I say that because I stopped at 2 kids. Had I had a gaggle, a flock or a herd, I would probably be singing a different tune.