Welcome to Snarkfest

Welcome to my snarky corner of the web. Join me as I discuss everything from wine to chocolate. There may be a few other topics mixed in there too. I talk a bunch about my amazing offspring, 24 and 21. I sometimes go on and on about my secret crush on the amazing Mike Rowe. I talk about things that irritate me or things that make me happy. Sometimes I just talk to hear myself talk. Feedback is always appreciated but please make sure it's respectable. No nudity or profanity. I'm the only one allowed to be profane. But any and all snark is welcome and appreciated!
Showing posts with label Food Lion. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Food Lion. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

A-HA moments and cookie whores.

Last week while 14 was at Cross Country practice, I decided that since we are broke, I'd do my grocery shopping at the local Aldi, rather than at Food Kitty where we usually shop. Very few name brands there at Aldi, but their prices are freaking awesome. I ended up with 12 boxes of cereal, and each box was under $2.00. Sure I took my chances on off brands (Millville brand cereal anyone? Anyone?)  I bought two boxes of fake Lucky Charms. This was Monday at 7:00 p.m. By Tuesday morning, both boxes were gone. Apparently the fake Lucky Charms were a hit. It was also the first time that 14 had ever actually eaten the actual cereal WITH the marshmallows. EUREKA!! "Mom, if you actually eat the cereal WITH the marshmallows it's AWESOME!!" Normally 14 picks out the marshmallows and eats those first, THEN eats the cereal bits. It's amazing what can happen when you come out of your box.

Sadly, though, not all of those cheapy boxes of cereal were good. They have a fake Banana Nut Crunch cereal (Post makes the real version and it's great) and it tastes a lot like ass, only nastier. Not that I've actually eaten ass, but if I did, I'm guessing it would be a step up from this fake banana shit. It's all granola with dehydrated banana chips mixed in. Separately, they may taste somewhat decent, but put them together and charge $1.60 per box, and you've got a box of ass. Seriously. If I'd actually spent on this crap what Post normally charges for the real stuff, I'd shit out a puppy. And it would taste better than this cereal. Lesson learned.

A few weeks ago I was talking to my friend Lorrie about marketing my blog a bit better. I had talked with Jen, the head mistress over at People I Want To Punch In The Throat and she suggested doing the Blog Hop at You Know It Happens At Your House Too. Prior to that, I had basically whored myself out to all of my Facebook friends, begging them all to not only read my blog but to post the link on their pages too, thereby getting me more traffic to my site. I had not developed a Facebook page or a Twitter account for the blog but when Jen suggested I do that, I thought, 'GEEZ! Why didn't I think of that??' Another a-ha moment. Which brings me to the conversation with Lorrie I mentioned way back at the beginning of this paragraph. When she and I were discussing my whoring myself out to all my friends for my blog, she mentioned that all Girl Scout moms whore themselves out when it comes time to sell Girl Scout cookies. Wow, I had never thought of that but it's true! It's not the actual Girl Scouts that do most of the selling, it's their moms who become cookie whores. How many of us bring the order form to work and go around, desk to desk, unbuttoning the top three buttons, leaning casually forward so that just a hint of clevage is showing and ask in our most sultry voice, "hey, wanna buy some cookies?" Okay that might not actually work with our female co-workers but it sure does get the men to buy them by the case. Yes, we moms will go the extra mile to make sure little Suzie gets to go on that end of the year horseback riding trip.