Welcome to Snarkfest

Welcome to my snarky corner of the web. Join me as I discuss everything from wine to chocolate. There may be a few other topics mixed in there too. I talk a bunch about my amazing offspring, 24 and 21. I sometimes go on and on about my secret crush on the amazing Mike Rowe. I talk about things that irritate me or things that make me happy. Sometimes I just talk to hear myself talk. Feedback is always appreciated but please make sure it's respectable. No nudity or profanity. I'm the only one allowed to be profane. But any and all snark is welcome and appreciated!

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Lazy slugs unite!!

I've been such a freaking SLUG lately!! No offense to slugs but DAYUM I don't feel like doing a friggin' thing. Seriously. I believe that in the past week I've put on about 79 lbs. No lie. Eat, drink, be merry, repeat. That's been my mantra. Have I run even one time? No sir I have not. I worked exactly one and one half days  this past week. When I wasn't working I was either eating or sleeping. Or farting around on FB. Truly. Santa must've taken all my willpower and all my motivation with him when he dropped off our gifts.

Dear Barbara I'm lazy! Lucky for me I already own a gym membership, so I won't be buying one to begin a New Year's resolution. I WILL, however, be heading to the gym with all the other resolutioners who got fat during the past week (year) like me.  Starting Wednesday. I mean really, Sunday I could start running but I'd undo any good when I eat, drink, be merry and repeat on Monday. And besides, my gym is closed on Tuesday. And we've finally had snow here so the canal will be snowy and muddy and way too dangerous to go for a run on, what with all the leaves and the roots and the snow and mud. 

So yes, I am the epitome of lazy ass. But on the plus side (?) I've been spending oodles of quality time with my kids. It's been awesome (?). We've watched TV like nobody's business! And eat! Oh my goodness we've been eating like champions!! We could take gold at the Olympics if eating and watching TV were actual events. We'd be the United States Lazy Ass Eating and Watching TV Team!! USA! USA!

I can honestly say I'm really looking forward to Wednesday when the girls go back to school and I go back to a normal routine. Gym, work, run around picking up girls from practices, dinner, FB, sleep, repeat.  There really is something to be said for routine. It's so....routine, but yet so awesome. Everyone is where they're supposed to be, everyone is relatively productive and I'm not in the house all day surrounded by cookies, pies, cakes and other delightful, delicious temptations that just keep jumping into my mouth! It's crazy! Come on, I can't be the only person in the world who has sugar cookies hurl themselves into my mouth every time I walk by them, can I?? 

I am? 

Damn.

Dear Santa, 
Please bring my willpower, my motivation and my size 8 body back soon.
Love,
Snarky

21 comments:

  1. OMg......I think you totally described me...I am soooo lazy I can't even think of what to write...seriously I think the holidays ate my brain...and I too gained like a gazillion pounds...now trying to work it off...it's horrible....i don't know why it's always EAT and BE MERRY can't I BE MERRY w/o all the eating >.< guess not....

    i don't know when it's going to wear off or go away but....man...my blog is like dying...

    Dear Santa,
    Me tooo....

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    1. I'm so glad it's not just me!! I was starting to think that my career as a blogger was coming to an end.

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  2. There's something to be said for being lazy here and there, recharging, etc., too... ;-)

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    1. I feel like I'm in good company if we're all recharging!!!

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  3. Um...the homemade toffee I'm shoveling in my mouth while reading this suddenly tastes like sisterhood.! 3 more days of gluttony!!

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    1. My sister!! The sugar cookies that we still have left over from Christmas definitely taste sweeter with my sisters. And don't even get me started on the banana bread I baked today.

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  4. I'll be competing with you for the gold!

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    1. It's on, Eva! As soon as I drag my ass off the couch, I'm all over competing with you. Just one more episode of The Big Bang Theory and then all bets are off!

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  5. I have been the SAME way. especially with the whole eat, drink, be merry thing. With the holidays and then a family wedding this week, I gained half a dozen pounds I am sure....UGH! I need to get my act together!!! Glad to know I am not alone! xo

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  6. I love it! And dude - I'll take the size 8 - hell at this point a 14 would rock my world! By March I tell you - we can share our will powers!!!!

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    Replies
    1. Most definitely, Joy! There's strength in numbers!

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  7. OMG, 12 lbs while I have been nursing my IT band. IT STOPS NOW (right after I finish last nights donuts)-Wonder Woman

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    1. Hey WW, I've got no excuse other than laziness for my weight. At least you can say you haven't been able to run. I've been able, just haven't been motivated. But that number on that scale is definitely a motivator.

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  8. I was just happy to spend 15 minutes on my Wii Fit this morning. Tomorrow's goal? 15 more.

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    Replies
    1. Baby steps, whatever it takes to get to the long term goal!

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  9. It must be contagious in the blogosphere. Maybe it's all the snot going around, making us feel like we need to be slugs :) Slug-a-lug!

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    Replies
    1. Next year we should take something to fight the sluggies early!

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  10. I saw the photos of myself at our office holiday party and OMG I have a double chin!! I cannot believe I managed to put on so much weight without noticing!! And yet, here I am sitting at the computer, eating cookies!! *sigh*

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    1. LOL I hear ya, Roshni. I didn't get this double chin by eating salad while at my computer.

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