I Broke a Promise, But I'm Thankful

Taking a break from being a snarky bitch for a day (don't worry, I'll be back to my old self soon) to confess something to you all. Remember when I said I was going to call my mom everyday like I used to when I lived in Jersey? Remember I wrote that here? Well, I broke that promise. And I'm ashamed. I talked with Mom today, after a 2 week silence, and she called me out on it. Busy isn't really a good excuse. It's a shitty excuse and I should be ashamed, no, I AM ashamed that I use that as an excuse not to call and touch base with my Mom.

So Mom, I know you'll never read this because you don't have a computer and you are scared to death of them, but I called you this afternoon and told you, and now I'm putting it here for all 4 of you Snarkfest fans to read. I will make time to call you. I will call you at least twice a week, you have my word. And you 4 Snarkfest followers (you know who you are Aunt Irene, old neighbor Anna May, that creepy guy in line at Blockbuster I met 23 years ago and Henry (my dog) who I know can read, I am counting on you to keep me honest. Check up on me. Keep me in line. Ask me when the last time was that I called my Mom.

Now onto the Thankful. My nazicrackhorunningbitch partner Lisa finished her JFK 50 mile run in style last Saturday. Here she is crossing the finish line. That's all of us screaming for her so you may want to turn down your sound a little, but don't turn it off. You'll want to hear the announcer say her name just after she crossed:

Notice that guy at he very end who pops his head up from the lower right hand corner. Lisa and I cracked up when we saw his little head come into the frame.

Anyway, when Lisa knew that I was having a hard day today, feeling the guilt about not being in touch with my mom, she texted me while I was running. Here's what the text said:

Remember this is Thanksgiving, so be thankful that you have a mom alive to give you shit :)

And she's exactly right. I lost my Dad 2 years ago and while we weren't as close as we could have been, I miss him every day. And knowing that my Mom IS still here to give me shit makes me thankful. And thankful too, for friends like Lisa to kick my ass when I need a good ass kicking. And for her tenacity and persistence for putting her mind to it and, despite all the odds and obstacles stacked against her, finishing the JFK 50 Miler. Lisa, I'm so proud of you and thankful to have you in my life.

Ode to a Runner

About 3 years ago, she forced me to run about 15 feet to a stop sign. I hated her for that because I hate to run. I was wearing my cute white Reebok sneakers. Not running shoes by any means but they were good for walking around. The next day, she forced me to run beyond the stop sign to a tree about 10 feet past the tree. What a bitch. I cursed her. A lot.

We had started walking together after work at night and apparently she was becoming bored with walking. Did she not understand that I hated running? Apparently she understood. She just didn't care. Bitch. One evening we were walking laps around our local park. One full lap around is 8/10 of a mile. We walked a few laps and she decided we needed to run. My first time I made it half way around the park. And I died. Literally, I lost my life. Ok shut up, that's what it felt like. We got into her car and my face was a shade darker red than the color of her red car. I was short of breath, I was sweating, and most of all, I hated her.

But I didn't. How could I hate her? She was pushing me outside of my box. She was making me do things that SUCKED but it was for my own good. She knew it, and I didn't want to admit it. But she was helping me. And secretly I loved her for it.

We ran our first 5K together. Then our first 10K. When we went to get fitted for running shoes we were taken care of by this crazy woman who had to cut her 17 mile run short that morning to get ready for work. 17 miles. BAHAHAHAHA. She also had a GPS thingy that she wore when she ran. Nazi and I mocked her when we got to the car. What a nut! What a crazy ass psycho!! What kind of lunatic runs that far and has a GPS. This is what I get for mocking.

She ran my first Half Marathon with me next, and we crossed the finish line together, hand in hand. In February of the following year, she convinced me we had to run the Marine Corps Marathon, so we schlepped down to Quantico and ran the Marine Corps Race to Register 10K. If you finished that 10K you were guaranteed a spot in the Marathon that October. Did I mention that 10K was on the coldest morning in the history of cold mornings? No shit, it was about 2 degrees. But we finished it, and we registered for and then ran the Marine Corps Marathon on Halloween. She cried as she finished, overcome with emotion. (I was too busy drooling over hot Marines and trying not to die).

Marine Corps Marathon: Michelle, Nazinutjob, me & Diane.

Last September she invited me over, plied me with wine and strong-armed me into registering for the Goofy Challenge. For those of you who don't know, the Goofy Challenge is another term for Clinically Insane but that doesn't look as good on a T-shirt with a Disney character. So in January of this year, we flew to Disney, and ran a half marathon on Saturday, then a full marathon on Sunday. 39.3 miles in 2 days. It was lunacy. Sheer and utter ridiculousness. But it was a blast and I got a bunch of really cool bling out of it.

Diane on the left, me, and the Naziwhackjobrunningcrackho on the right

Me, Barb, Pluto, Diane and Psychocrazyrunningbitch

She's definitely been bitten by the 'no I need to go farther' bug. Bitten in her brain. In the past 2 years, I've lost track of how many full marathons she's run. She's a die hard runner and I am in awe. But wait, it gets better.

This past March she spearheaded the 1st Annual Keller Williams March for Kids Health 5K with the help of all of her Sole to Soul Sisters, our running family. This pic was taken as we were giving out the prizes to the winners of the race.

Susan and the Nazi. One of my favorite pictures. Ever.

Next weekend, she will take on the biggest challenge of her running career. This will quite possibly rank up there among one of the hardest things she's ever done. In her life. Next Saturday, she will run the JFK 50 Miler. This is a really special run for her. She celebrated her 50th birthday last December, and this year marks the 50th anniversary of this 50 mile run. She believes it's her destiny to run this race. And she's not letting anything silly like a little leg injury stop her from completing this monumental feat. She has an indomitable spirit, a huge heart, the most positive attitude I've ever come across and is truly one of the most generous people I've ever met.

So here's to you, Lisa Kingsbury. I will be with you during the JFK and can't wait to see you cross the finish line. I love you, my crazy lunatic friend. I dedicate the first beer to you.

It's all about the beer at the finish line.

My friend Lisa and I on her 50th birthday.