Somebody get this boy a muzzle....

Yes Justin, you HAVE been detrimental to your own career. Seriously, when is he going to go away? Snarklings, I give you the latest in Bieber-boneheaded-blunders. Thanks for the edits, TMZ.

So many words come to mind when I watch this. Arrogant. Immature. Ignorant. Dumbass (which to be honest is insulting to my cat!). Moronic. Egotistical. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. What other words can you come up with to describe this boy? If he ever had any talent (BIG if, if you ask me) he's just overshadowing that talent with his ridiculous antics. What would you do if this were your kid? If I was his mother, he'd be on lockdown, laying VERY low for a VERY long time until he could prove to me that he CAN be a normal, kind, humble, contributing member of society, rather than the punk ass monster he's become.

Wow! I must be psychic!!

I feel like I brought this on. Maybe it was just too much pressure, maybe I drove him to do it. But yes, I'm taking the blame for Bieber's antics. I'm thinking he probably read my last post and just could NOT bear the thought of me changing my name because of his behavior and that drove him to go out, take prescription drugs (that his mother allegedly gave him), smoke weed, drink booze, rent a Lamborghini and do 60 in a 30. My bad, yo.

I had no idea that when I posted my blog on Monday, it would drive him to do something so drastic. It's really unbelievable to me that I wield so much power, and yet I can't get my own children to clean up the kitchen after they make hot chocolate. I must be an amazing resource for other parents. Maybe I'll start renting myself out. I'm like the douchebag whisperer! Think about it: I posted on Monday about his antics and how I don't want my name to be that closely associated with his, and BAM! As if on cue, he goes out and proves his dumbassedness!

I need to be much more careful in my posts from now on. Wouldn't it just be AWFUL if I posted a blog about how badly I wanted to win the lottery....and then like, two days later, I DID?!?! Or maybe I should re-think posting that blog about how I would desperately LOVE to meet Mike Rowe! Wouldn't it just be horrible if he showed up in my town and I met him in a coffee shop and we fell instantly in love?? (sorry honey, but..MIKE ROWE!!!) No, that would be just TERRIBLE. So I will refrain from writing a post about my meeting Mike Rowe and having him fall in love with me. The consequences would be tragic (to my husband and family, for me, not so much).

The possibilities are endless! If you're looking for me, I'm off to go work on that blog post about how Jennifer Lawrence and I should become best friends.

I'm sure you've all heard by now

So unless you live under a very large rock, you've been made aware that Channing Tatum has been named as People's Sexiest Man Alive. And would you look at that! OMG! They're like, totally over! The Biebs is officially on the market again. How funny would it be if one of my daughters married the Bieb? Because seriously, if they hyphenated, their last name would be Biebel-Bieber. I'm not making this up. 15 Biebel-Bieber. They could have little baby Biebel-Biebers. Like Bobbie Biebel-Bieber, Barbie Biebel-Bieber, Benny Biebel-Bieber Billy Biebel-Bieber. Oh I could go on and on but you get the idea.

In other news, basketball season is starting for 15 and 13. I was selected by the team moms to be the mouthpiece against this hideous new logo our AD wanted to use for the teams' sweats. Now, for a boy, this is totally fine. Butch, tough, mean, etc. But for the girls team? Is this a Lady Cardinal to you:

Try looking at this without singing the Farmers Insurance jingle.
We are Cardinals, bum ba-dum bum bum-bum-bum

So I had some calls to make last night to some parents. One had no voicemail and there was no answer. Oh well. Too bad, so sad. Until my phone rang at 1:00 this morning and it was from that same number. Really? Really you're going to call me back at 1:00 because you didn't recognize the number???  Now granted, I wasn't actually AWAKE for the call. I saw that I missed it when I came downstairs this morning. But wow. Just, wow.

I'm pleased to say that I am the winner of the Thankful Giving Blogger Roundup Giveaway! Imagine my surprise when I saw my name as the winner!!! What did I win, you ask?? Well I'll tell you. $200 cash money! Not only that but I also will receive a new cookbook (BEFORE it's released to the public, as well as an apron for when I'm making recipes from that cookbook). There is also a surprise gift, which I can only assume will be Channing Tatum showing up at my house to cook me breakfast, wearing my new apron. And nothing more. Watch that bacon splatter, Chan honey. So anyway I really want to take a moment to thank all of the bloggers who put this giveaway together because now I've got a little extra cash for Christmas shopping. I know for a fact that Funny Postpartum Lady was the ringleader so thank you Liz, and Rebecca at Frugalistablog also had a hand in it, so thank you Rebecca! My girl Jenn from My Daily Jenn-isms also participated, so thank you Jenn! I feel like a real schmeal because I'm not 100% certain what other bloggers were participating in this giveaway so if anyone knows, please post it in the comments or message me on FB and let me know so that I may give them a proper thank you. And by proper thank you I mean big, wet, sloppy kisses.

Now on a totally unrelated issue, did you know that you can go online and sell your used panties?? Do you really think I could make this up? Really? Wow you give me way too much credit. Through the magic that is Twitter, I learned from Crasstalk that you can, indeed, go online to this website and sell your panties. Or your manties, if you're a dude. Seriously. Ew.

Well that's all for now. I've wasted enough of your time and have wasted enough of my afternoon when I really should've been doing work, saving the world, looking at satellite images etc. So I bid you a fond adieu for now, mes amis! Bon appetite! Bon soir! Buenos tacos. And snarky hugs.