Welcome to Snarkfest

Welcome to my snarky corner of the web. Join me as I discuss everything from wine to chocolate. There may be a few other topics mixed in there too. I talk a bunch about my amazing offspring, 19 and 17. I sometimes go on and on about my secret crush on the amazing Mike Rowe. I talk about things that irritate me or things that make me happy. Sometimes I just talk to hear myself talk. Feedback is always appreciated but please make sure it's respectable. No nudity or profanity. I'm the only one allowed to be profane. But any and all snark is welcome and appreciated!

Thursday, November 15, 2012

I'm sure you've all heard by now

So unless you live under a very large rock, you've been made aware that Channing Tatum has been named as People's Sexiest Man Alive. And would you look at that! OMG! They're like, totally over! The Biebs is officially on the market again. How funny would it be if one of my daughters married the Bieb? Because seriously, if they hyphenated, their last name would be Biebel-Bieber. I'm not making this up. 15 Biebel-Bieber. They could have little baby Biebel-Biebers. Like Bobbie Biebel-Bieber, Barbie Biebel-Bieber, Benny Biebel-Bieber Billy Biebel-Bieber. Oh I could go on and on but you get the idea.

Shirtless, mustached and with their dogs. Hmmm, what if they have kitties? Aren't men with kitties sexy?
In other news, basketball season is starting for 15 and 13. I was selected by the team moms to be the mouthpiece against this hideous new logo our AD wanted to use for the teams' sweats. Now, for a boy, this is totally fine. Butch, tough, mean, etc. But for the girls team? Is this a Lady Cardinal to you:
Try looking at this without singing the Farmers Insurance jingle.
We are Cardinals, bum ba-dum bum bum-bum-bum


So I had some calls to make last night to some parents. One had no voicemail and there was no answer. Oh well. Too bad, so sad. Until my phone rang at 1:00 this morning and it was from that same number. Really? Really you're going to call me back at 1:00 because you didn't recognize the number???  Now granted, I wasn't actually AWAKE for the call. I saw that I missed it when I came downstairs this morning. But wow. Just, wow.

I'm pleased to say that I am the winner of the Thankful Giving Blogger Roundup Giveaway! Imagine my surprise when I saw my name as the winner!!! What did I win, you ask?? Well I'll tell you. $200 cash money! Not only that but I also will receive a new cookbook (BEFORE it's released to the public, as well as an apron for when I'm making recipes from that cookbook). There is also a surprise gift, which I can only assume will be Channing Tatum showing up at my house to cook me breakfast, wearing my new apron. And nothing more. Watch that bacon splatter, Chan honey. So anyway I really want to take a moment to thank all of the bloggers who put this giveaway together because now I've got a little extra cash for Christmas shopping. I know for a fact that Funny Postpartum Lady was the ringleader so thank you Liz, and Rebecca at Frugalistablog also had a hand in it, so thank you Rebecca! My girl Jenn from My Daily Jenn-isms also participated, so thank you Jenn! I feel like a real schmeal because I'm not 100% certain what other bloggers were participating in this giveaway so if anyone knows, please post it in the comments or message me on FB and let me know so that I may give them a proper thank you. And by proper thank you I mean big, wet, sloppy kisses.

Now on a totally unrelated issue, did you know that you can go online and sell your used panties?? Do you really think I could make this up? Really? Wow you give me way too much credit. Through the magic that is Twitter, I learned from Crasstalk that you can, indeed, go online to this website and sell your panties. Or your manties, if you're a dude. Seriously. Ew.

Well that's all for now. I've wasted enough of your time and have wasted enough of my afternoon when I really should've been doing work, saving the world, looking at satellite images etc. So I bid you a fond adieu for now, mes amis! Bon appetite! Bon soir! Buenos tacos. And snarky hugs.


36 comments:

  1. Apparently I live under a rock. Until now.

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    1. Well come on out of there and give Channing a run for his money, Marc!

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  2. Channing and I would make beautiful babies together...I'm just sayin.

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    1. I have no doubt. Just make sure you don't sell his manties for a profit.

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  3. Somehow, your girl marrying the Bieber seems to me to be such a bad idea!! :P
    That logo totally sucks for a girls' team! What were they thinking?!!
    And, congratulations on your prize!!

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    1. Thanks honey!! And yeah, we have enough trouble with our own last name, we don't need to add his to the mix.

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  4. About the used panties thing, there's a company in Japan that sells them mango-scented (there's some information you now can't un-know).

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  5. I did not know. I just crawled out from under my rock to buy panties.

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  6. 7 and 10 are cracking up over Barney Biebel-Bieber. That logo blows. Keep up the funny dear friend! Miss u tons!

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    1. Then my work here is done. Glad they got a laugh out of it. :)

      Miss you a bunch babe.

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  7. That's a lot of information this early in the morning, Teri. Maybe I'll go lie back down and let it all sink in.

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    1. Sorry for the brain overload, Kathy. Hope you rested and didn't have nightmare visions of manties dancing in your head. :)

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  8. Its too early for them tongue twisters beibal bieber hahaha too funny. Congrats on winning that 200$ thats awesome lucky ducky!

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  9. Mother of ... panties? Really? I was going to comment on the hilarity of the hyphenated names and the atrocious "lady" Cardinal but that sorta derailed me. Anyhoo, found you via the blog hop and I totally <3 snark!

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    1. Thanks for stopping by! Sorry about the panties getting you off track. ;)

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  10. I so did NOT need to hear about that website...ICK. *shudder*

    I hope your girls get a new logo quick, because that one is horrible.

    And in semi-related news my mother was highly disappointed when I got married that I dropped my maiden name all together. She wanted me to use it for my middle name, and be Alex Hodges Hodge. Um no thank you, lol.

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    1. Alex, we did come up with a new one! :(

      And I can't believe you didn't hyphenate! Wait, I'll give you one better, when I worked in the casino we had a guest who used to win lots of money so we always saw his name on documents. The name: Lazlo Lazlo

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  11. Biebel-Bieber...I like it!!!!! lol!
    and I was SO EXCITED when I saw that you won the giveaway! Congrats!!!!

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  12. I wish I could comment on what you wrote but i honestly can't get past the magazine cover ;)

    off to sell my panties

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  13. This is the most AWESOMEness recap EVER! I feel so informed and updated post reading this post!
    Reselling of undies, huh? 0_o Gee Whiz! What has the world come to? LOL!

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    1. Happy I could be of help! Thanks for reading.

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  14. Used undies? I have a few that I can no longer wear. Hmmm... I really NEED money right now...

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  15. Wow. I was bopping right along with little Bebe Beibel-Beiber there until I facewalled into the thought of someone wanting to buy my underwear. Yep, you really can find anything on the internet, even when you're not expecting to. Congratulations on your win, and thank you for the chuckle. I always enjoy your posts. ~*♥*~

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    1. Thanks Thia!! And I always love your comments! :)

      It's a win-win.

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    2. Holy crud someone actually called you back at 1 am? Insecure wife perhaps? lol! Barf on the used undies. Congrats on your win!

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  16. Congrats. I could pass on the herpified panties but clearly it is a viable option for some :) I always laugh when I come visit. Good Luck with Chan he will always remember the gal who licked the bacon grease off his chest!

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    1. He better remember me! Or I'll buy him a pair of used panties (manties) and make him wear them!!

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  17. Bodacious Biebel-Bieber? Lovin' the pic of Chan, hating the cardinal logo and EEEWWWW on the under ware (too many sickos out there). Congrats on the win--buy a GIGANTIC turkey for Thanksgiving and eat like a Viking!

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    1. Thanks Mama, I'm planning on making a pig out of myself!! :)

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  18. CONGRATS!!!! and I think I peed a little with the Biebel-Bieber stuff....bawahahahahha.

    And thank god you are working on a new logo - was a victim of some such logo as a high school girl and it was brutal.

    Have fun shopping and cooking, cooking and shopping, and being awesome!!!

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