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Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Seriously? Labels needed on soda?

Warning: rant ahead. Proceed with caution. I just came across this link posted on Freakbook by my friend Sue and I'm just flabbergasted. (that's such a great word, isn't it?) It's a story from the Huffington Post  which states that this woman, Natasha Harris, 31 years old and mother to 8 (that's right I said EIGHT children) died from drinking 2 gallons of Coca-Cola every day. Oh and in addition to her 'Coke' habit she also smoked up to 30 cigarettes a day according to this article, also from HuffPo.
A New Zealand coroner recommended warning labels be placed on soft drinks after the court linked Coca-Cola to the death of 31-year-old Natasha Harris.
Now, the coroner in her case said that the beverage company needs to put warning labels on their product telling of the dangers of over-consumption. I'm sorry but that's just ridiculous and the coroner should be slapped in the head with a stapler. Common sense, people. Get some!! What's next?? Are we such a fucked up idiotic society that we need labels telling us what common sense should tell us? Do we need warning labels for such obvious things like:

Stoves: warning, fire is hot, don't put your hand on the flame that you're using to cook your dinner. It will burn. It will hurt.

Ovens: warning, gas comes out of this device and if you stick your head inside, it might either cook you or poison you. Either way, it'll hurt.

Cars: warning, cars are big and heavy so if you see one coming, do NOT, under any circumstances, jump in front of it. It will hurt.

Doors: warning, if you shut this device with your finger in it, it will hurt. Don't be a dumbass.

Coffee makers: warning, pour the contents of the pot into a mug and then add some cream or milk. Drinking it right out of the pot will burn your mouth, because guess what, asshat: COFFEE'S HOT and it will hurt.

Zoos: warning, don't jump into the lion's/tiger's/bears cage because guess what? They are carnivores. If you don't know what it means, leave the zoo and go buy a dictionary. Otherwise, they will eat you for dinner with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.

Matches: warning, if you light this match and put it near your hair, you will burn your hair off. Wig companies will love you and your business, burn units will think you're an asshole. Either way, it will hurt.

Interstates: warning, there are lots of big, heavy cars and trucks on this thing, and therefore please do not decide to have a game of touch football with your drunken buddies because as stated up there in #3, cars are heavy, trucks are heavier. You WILL become roadkill and it WILL hurt.

Electrical outlets: warning, do not wet your finger and stick it in these little holes. You will end up getting fried and yes, that will hurt.

Baggies full of pot: warning, if you smoke this shit, you may get the overwhelming urge to eat countless bags of Doritos, dozens of Snickers bars and maybe 2 gallons of Coke. You'll get fat, and trying to squeeze into your size 16's will hurt. 

Are you seeing a pattern here? Where do we draw the line at warning labels? When does it become industry's job to teach you not to be an idiot? Do we have McDonald's put a label on every Happy Meal stating: "Warning, over-consumption may lead you to be a lazy fat ass so ask your mommy to take you out for a nice salad instead"?? Will Tastycakes boxes come with a label that says "Warning, if you eat this entire box in one sitting, your size 16's will no longer fit you"? The same could be said for Girl Scout cookies? Am I going to sue the little Girl Scouts for feeding my Thin Mint habit? Cuz those bitches are like crack to me. (Thin Mints, not Girl Scouts, you perverts).

When does it all end? When does common sense win out over ignorance? And whatever HAPPENED to common sense anyway?



40 comments:

  1. When I read the article and saw how much she was drinking, I was floored. Anything can be harmful in excess, even water! People need to use common sense, honestly.

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    1. Sadly, common sense seems to be a thing of the past Kelley.

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  2. Our litigious society is what happened to common sense. Companies are being forced to place CYA labels on everything. It's the dumbasses (like this chick) who make the news because of their extreme stupidity, and then someone over in XYZ Company's legal office starts to have a litter of kittens about potential lawsuits. The rest of us who still possess common sense are left merely to shake our heads.

    I guess this means I should probably give up on my dream of working up to two gallons of coffee a day?

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  3. How does the coroner know that the eight childbirths and kids before the age of 31 not kill her? I mean seriously?

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  4. How does the coroner know that the eight childbirths and kids before the age of 31 not kill her? I mean seriously?

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    1. I needed a drink just thinking about that!

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  5. To be fair, I do think that what the world needs now is more stickers and labels that say "Don't Be A Dumb Ass". I am constantly insulted by signs in restrooms that tell me to wash my hands. People shouldn't need to be reminded!!!! GROSS! RIP common sense. Great post!

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  6. Those "wash your hands signs" actually work. Well, that's only partly true, they work for women but have no impact on men. That's not me being a man hater, just the facts.

    But yeah, common sense has left the building.

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  7. I agree Jen! Products need a DUH! sticker on them. I also love how everything needs a label. My bag of carrots says: Ingredients: Carrots. Oh, thank you! We are certainly becoming a Lowest Common Denominator society. How pathetic.

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    1. Thank God you didn't buy the carrots that had arsenic listed as an ingredient, Tracy.

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    2. Hot dogs come with choking warnings now. At least, the Oscar Mayer turkey dogs do.

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  8. After reading the first paragraph I had to stop and vomit. People do some crazy stuff. I see warnings on things and I think someone actually had to do that before that warning got slapped on. When we were in S. Africa they didn't have warnings like that. You'd see signs like "Swim at your own risk: Crocodiles present." Nobody said you couldn't swim, but if you got a limb eaten off don't go crying to anyone. People need more common sense. Although, having eight kids had to be pretty hard.

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    1. Mindy said it best, Lillian, here someone would sue the crocodile for eating their limb.

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  9. Label, sh-mabel! That's not gonna keep stupid people from making themselves sick and using the healthcare system that you and I are paying for. People should be allowed to eat, drink, smoke, or ingest anything they want, but I shouldn't have to pay for their lack of common sense. Can we get a label to that effect in every hospital? Maybe then we would have affordable healthcare and lower taxes! (Not funny, I know, but that's why I let you blog so I can laugh and then rant.)

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    1. Terri you're exactly right! Rant away!

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  10. I'm sure she died from ODing on COKE not the 30 cigarette per day habit. Poor thing....if only she'd known....

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    1. Yes, if only Coke came with a label that said 'Warning: Drinking 2 gallons of coke a day may rot your teeth, make you fat and eventually kill you' she'd be alive today to be a mama to those 8 babies. Shame.

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  11. I want to know where she found the TIME to drink two gallons of coke and smoke thirty cigarettes with 8 kids running around!

    Also, look how caved-in her mouth looks. I bet she lost all her teeth. Thanks again, Coke!

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    1. I've got 2 and don't have the time to drink a quart of water a day. Speaking of water, shouldn't water come with a label that says "Warning: drinking too much water makes you pee a lot"?

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  12. So so so great! I couldn't agree more!

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    1. Sounds like a story I missed for my WTF Wednesday! There are so many sad cases out there of shit for brains!

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  13. The powers that be better back off and LEAVE MY DIET COKE ALONE! It's the only real vice I have!

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    1. LOL Dyanne! Just ignore any labels you may see on the cans.

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  14. O.M.G. Where the hell do people come up with this stuff?! Warning labels on coke? Puh-lease. But I do love your idea of putting a warning label on water, because I always forget how counterproductive it makes me. I just don't have the kind of time to waste peeing 3,000 times a day when I drink it! ;)

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    1. Peeing CAN be counterproductive! There should be warnings on toilet paper though, stating that use of this product will leave your hiney clean and fresh as a daisy. NOT using this product may cause loss of friends, loss of job and a nasty rash.

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  15. unfortunately we have to understand that their are A LOT of idiots in this world!!!! and by a lot i mean A SHIT LOAD! lol. First off, coke is HORRIBLE to be drinking anyway.. It is something I will NOT introduce to my son or future kids. Im not gonna lie, once in a while I will crave a sip of coke.. but just a SIP not the whole can or gallon.. Coke has no NUTRITIONAL value.. we do it because of PLEASURE! drinking gallons of it and smoking damn, sounds like she shouldn't have 8 kids then! LOL... we live in a dumb world were society wants to make us dumber so they can take over!!! I believe we lose sense when the world offers us fatty foods for $1 and Micky d's kiddy meals cheap so we can feed out children junk food. Keep us dumb and in full control they will have! anywayyyyy, LOL im following from TGIF blog hop! hope to have you follow me as well :)

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  16. Too many asshats in the world with nothing but air between their ears. Although I must admit I chuckled over the zoo comment. Idiots do that stuff all the time "Oh look, it's Yogi The Bear! Let's go over the fence and pet him!!!" On a lighter note, I have an award for you if you are interested in stopping by to grab it. Not a complicated one with a gazillion rules, either. Hope you'll like it. Congrats!

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  17. I have a friend who passed away recently, she had lung issues but she drank three two liters of diet coke per day and my kids always said she was going to die from that! She also smoked a lot too! BUT LABELS on SODA, so completely ridiculous!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOW!!!!!

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    1. I'm sorry to hear about your loss, Carolyn.

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  18. At first I was in dismay that someone could consume that much cola.. then I realized that again people are stupid. 8 Kids.. I feel so bad for them, because unfortunately people don't need common sense to have children. In fact if she had any common sense she probably wouldn't have 8 kids. I have 2 of my own and 3 step kids and I question my common sense on a daily basis. Thing is with common sense it's not common anymore. There is no cure for stupidity and with each generation more stupidity is being born. I did however have a good giggle at your warnings, because seriously they are so true! It's all the same. I mean why do we have commercials for toilet paper??? Who isn't buying that? I also have an addiction to Thin mints.. they're just so delicious. Perhaps if I eat 2 tonnes of them a day I could be just like the woman who died from the coke.. ahh- dreams. :)

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    1. Megan, that's one of the best quotes I've ever heard, common sense isn't so common anymore.

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  19. I LOVE THIS POST! Couldn't agree more!!

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  20. Next thing you know they will put a warning label on Mr. Clean Magic Erasers that they aren't to be used on human skin. Geesh!

    Love ya!

    Deb

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    1. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Coffee, out my nose, onto my keyboard. Thanks Deb!!! Love you back!

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