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Welcome to my snarky corner of the web. Join me as I discuss everything from wine to chocolate. There may be a few other topics mixed in there too. I talk a bunch about my amazing offspring, 19 and 17. I sometimes go on and on about my secret crush on the amazing Mike Rowe. I talk about things that irritate me or things that make me happy. Sometimes I just talk to hear myself talk. Feedback is always appreciated but please make sure it's respectable. No nudity or profanity. I'm the only one allowed to be profane. But any and all snark is welcome and appreciated!

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Stupid drivers ruin my sunny disposition...

Is it okay to beat the snot out of drivers who pass you using the shoulder of the highway? If it's not, it really ought to be. Back around Thanksgiving, I was driving back from Jersey on 95 (that's Interstate 95 for all you westerners) and there was a terrible tractor trailer accident. Traffic was backed up for miles and we were stuck in the same spot for over an hour. The next exit to get off 95 was on the other side of the accident, so there was really no escape. No matter how much faster you passed all of us who were basically stuck in that parking lot of a highway, you weren't going anywhere. All traffic was being diverted from the right and middle lanes into the far left lane.


That's me in the red car shaking my fist.
As I sat there, I watched countless assbags driving up the right shoulder and left shoulder of the highway. WTF? I totally get that people are in a hurry. I totally get that you think there MAY be a way out of the jam, but what makes these people think that they are SO MUCH more important than the rest of us poor schlubs stuck in our lanes? Seriously. I watched several tow trucks attempt to access the accident scene but they were barred from getting there because there were so many fucktards blocking the shoulders. Fucktards who thought, "Hell, I'm not sitting here waiting, I'll just drive on the shoulder up as far as I can go and bypass all these other losers who are stupid enough to wait in their lanes. Because I'm more important than they are. I've got places to be!" Fucknuts. I hate them. It should be legal to pull them from their vehicles and beat them with a baseball bat or a tire iron.


I hate those people with such a heightened sense of entitlement that they believe they truly should be allowed to pass everyone, and pass them in the lanes where emergency personnel may have to drive. Don't they realize that they are only causing MORE traffic, MORE headaches and possibly endangering the lives of those involved in the accident? If they pass people using the shoulders and then THEY become backed up, how will the ambulances, fire trucks or tow trucks be able to access the scene?? It was, indeed, a good lesson for 17 to learn as we sat there in traffic. I bitched and ranted so much that I know for a fact passing on the shoulders in traffic is something she will never, ever do.

Ugh!! I just really needed to get that off my chest. And now I feel much better. Thanks for letting me vent. What about you? What is YOUR biggest pet peeve out there on the highway?




10 comments:

  1. I can't really relate to this since my twitchy epilepsy brain makes me not allowed to drive. Stupid laws and needing to be awake when driving. But it seems to me everyone is a bit ranty today, don't you think?
    It's nice that everyone's venting though.

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    1. Sorry about that whole "no seizures or sleep-driving" laws you've got there Jamie. I do feel better myself.

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  2. Beating the dog shit out of stoopid people is always acceptable - especially if they are smaller, older and more frail than you are. I would advise you, however, to not attempt to confront a guy on a Harley who's wearing a leather jacket with "1%er" stitched on it. These guys have very poor senses of humor.

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    1. Duly noted, thanks for the advice, Toby!

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  3. As a fellow assbag that was stuck on I-95 during the holidays (fuck you South Carolina), I can relate. We should be allowed to shoot cars that pass on the shoulder with paintball guns, so that they can all be stopped further down the road and given exorbitant tickets for "Excessive Douchenozzelry".

    Same goes for the incessant "lane changers". "Oh wait, that lane moved 6 feet, LEMME IN!!" "Oh, shit, now the other one moved 6 feet, LEMME BACK OVER!"

    I swear I'm getting one of those 'bitch bars' the cops have on the front of their cars and shoving the next asshole that crams his nose in front of me under a semi.

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    Replies
    1. Excessive Douchenozzelry. That's my new favorite term

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  4. Try driving in Florida sometime. You'll want to kill someone.

    So glad I use mass transit and don't own a car. I added at least ten years to my life that way.

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    1. I-75 in Tampa. Every. Damn. Morning.

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    2. Have you seen some of the new Tough Mudder obstacles, Phil? You'll rethink those extra 10 years!

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