My apologies? Not so fast......

First, let me start by rescinding the apology I made over the weekend to the good folks at the place I linked to in that blog that caused such an uproar. I pretty much caused someone's panties to get in a bunch. Not very positive. You know the blog of which I speak. Okay, I am hereby rescinding the apology that I typed out and posted on one of the co-founders' blogs because she said that I had 'laid hurt on' her heart. If you aren't sure wtf I'm talking about, go through the blogs I posted within the past few days, then scroll down and read one of the last comments posted, you'll see two different blogs mentioned in that comment, right before I swallowed my pride and got all weepy and sorry. Yeah, about that. I've decided that I'm NOT sorry I said what I said. What I AM sorry for is that people put themselves out there in the innerwebs, opening themselves up for all kinds of things, and then get all sad and sensitive when someone says a word against them. Here's a suggestion: grow a thicker skin. I was kind in my mocking. There are others out there that would be more than happy to give you a punch in the throat and not be sorry.

I went to the one blog and read what she had written about my 'cruelty' and about how what I said was 'thoughtless, careless and rude'. Now, me being the nice person I am (shut up) and not looking to get anyones' knickers in a twist, I apologized for hurting her feelings. I said that that was not my intent. But you know what? I shouldn't have to apologize for my opinion. And you know what else? It's been 3 days since I posted that apology in a comment and I have not seen one single acknowledgement regarding my words. If someone was thoughtless, careless and rude to me and I got all sad and weepy, and then they came back and apologized, I'd damn well acknowledge that apology. I'd at least say "Hey so and so, I appreciate your saying that you're sorry. I respect that you had the decency to come to MY page and publicly apologize to me for hurting my feelings." But I didn't even get so much as a "Hey Snarkfest, eat shit". So as I stated, I'm rescinding the apology. I'm not sorry. If you open yourself up to the world with an idea, you have to know that NOT everyone is going to say 'wow, that's brilliant, you're a genius, here's money to get it started.' If you believe that, you are living in fantasy land, so say hi to Mickey for me. As a matter of fact, when I initially saw the original idea for my blog post on that site, trying to raise money to make their dream a reality, they were only at $2600 in contributions. Now they are over $3200. I'd like to think that possibly my little controversy may have given them the sympathy donation and they've actually raised money because of my words. And she admitted that I taught her a lesson in empathy and living in choice. (Did I mention she's a life coach? That's a whole other blog post itself!)

Look, this is my blog. From here on out I will stand by what I say. I will make no apologies for voicing my opinions. If I think something is ridiculous, I'm going to say it, because that's who I am. I make no apologies for my opinions. I am a good person (shut up again) and I'm raising my kids to have a sense of humor. And I feel so badly for those who do not have one. You should get one. They're nice.

Happy Birthday, 13!!

Oh my God, I've got two teenagers. Today is 13's birthday. She can no longer be called my baby, because she is taller than I am and becoming an amazing young woman. 13 has a million friends and is such a ray of sunshine to everyone who knows her. She just finished up her volleyball season and will be starting her basketball season. She can out sport me in every single sport she plays. She can also out run me. She's lightning fast compared to old mom. We ran the Freedom's Run yesterday and she rocked it. Much like she rocks out loud at everything she does. I'm so proud of her, for everything she is, everything she does, who she's become and her amazing outlook on life. She brings so much fun to everything she takes on and makes it her own.

When I was in labor with 15, I told the husband that as much as I know we said we wanted two kids, I didn't think I could go through it all again, so maybe we should just settle for one child. I'm so glad I reconsidered, because I cannot imagine life without the incredible 13 in my world.

My adorable 13. Photo courtesy Kelley Craig Photography

13 and I at the Shepherdstown Rotary's 'Potato Drop', bagging sweet potatoes for the hungry.

13 singing the National Anthem at the 5K we organized in March when our original singer cancelled. She rocked it.

So here's to you, 13. Thank you for being such an incredible inspiration to me and your dad, for being your sister's sidekick and co-hort and for becoming such a great young lady. I love you to the moon and back.

Evil Joy Speaks....to Snarkfest

Hey it’s Teri here from Snarkfest and since I’ve got the perfect face for radio, I’m sitting down for a tell-all interview with my guest, Joy from Evil Joy Speaks. Since this week's Blogger Idol Play-at-Home Link-Up has us interviewing one another, Joy has graciously agreed to come in and have a face to face with me. So how are ya, Joy?

Joy: Fabulous - working on consuming my third can of that sweet nectar of life, Diet

Dew. I’ve got a female spawn doing homework at 5:45 am (because she forgot about it)

in the room with me and a pup asleep on my lap. How are you my dear Teri aka

Snarkfest?

Awesome, Joy, I’m doing great. Thanks for stopping by to see us. Now, the readers of your blog have written in and have a bunch of questions that they’d love to have answered, so are you ready to give your fans what they want?

Joy: Ohhh yaaahhh, you betcha.

Cool, so let’s get started. Oh this first one is interesting because I always say I married

my husband because he’s tall and can reach things on high shelves. Oh and he’s great

at killing bugs too. So how about you, Joy? Why did you marry Dr. Evil?

Joy: Well, I suppose I should say something sweet like he was the perfect boy for me.

But I think since I’m Evil Joy as well as Joy - I’m going with knowing he was smart and

would be able to program my contacts into my cell phone for me.

Gotta love a man who knows his technology. Okay, next question, which Halloween candy do you steal from your ‘Evil Spawn’ and why?

Joy: Oh this is easy. Snickers Bars, followed by other chocolate candy bars, followed

by anything chocolate at all. Then...we’ll move on to the fruity sugary stuff like Skittles.

I always leave them the crap candy.

However this year - I’m not sure what I’m going to do. In previous years we had a dog

Fizzgig aka Smooshie (because I smooshed him with my car) who literally would steal

and eat chocolate with no ill side effects - other than puking all over my house. So...I’d

totally blame the dog if too much candy was gone. He couldn’t speak to point out my

LIE! But now....I’m not sure which dog I’ll blame it on....

I’m totally cool with taking the chocolate and blaming it on my hubby,

much like I blame the dog for any farts that happen to occur when someone else is in

the room with me. Which ties in perfectly with our next question: Do you fart in front of

your spouse? If you do, who gets the blame?

Joy: Nope! I worry it’ll be more of a shart. But evidently I do in my sleep because he

teases me about it. However, he’s the Fart Master in our family followed by Eldest

Female Spawn (age 9).

Where did you come up with your spawns’ names? Was it more fun to name your kids

or your pets? Who do you like to hang out with more? The kids or the pets?

Joy: Let’s see - 1st one - just liked it. 2nd one - 1st one chose it at age 2. We said

‘Baby Sister was born.’ He yelled, “NO Baby Female Spawn was born.”....

Third one - from a movie - if her hair had been red, it would have been slightly different.

Fourth one - we just liked it.

Dogs - more fun because it’s less important. And you get to do it more often as they

typically live longer than the spawn. We’ve had Einstein, Fizzgig, Shadow and now

Burton. Einstein - we’re geeks. Fizzgig - from the Dark Crystal. Shadow from some kid

movie. Burton because we got him and then bought six snowboards and assorted gear,

mainly Burton brand and we liked it.

As far as hanging out - I would say it depends. If the spawn are being annoying - I’ll

take puppy and dog any day. If puppy is sharting all over the carpet, the spawn don’t

seem so bad.

I hear ya. There are days when I can stand the kids more than the dogs. Then there are other days when I’d like to lock the kids in the crate and just chill with the dogs.  I’ve got a cat named Dumbass and that name fits her much better than her given name of Cinnamon. I’ve got a dog named Henry whose name fits him perfectly, he’s a true Henry. His brother is Cosmo, named for the fairy, Cosmo, from the Nickelodeon show The Fairly Oddparents. Cosmo is truly the perfect name for that boy, he loves shiny things and will stare at the wall where there once was something shiny for hours and hours.

Alright, next question: What is the most embarrassing thing you would do to your own

spawn and how much fun would it be?

Joy: I CAN’T WAIT to show the baby pictures to their future dates. Although that scares

me - Dates - yikes. I think it’ll be great to show the ones of them doing silly things like

locking themselves in the dog kennel....yeah yeah...they put themselves in there....

And there’s always the diapered pictures.

That - and I would love to write a book about all the crap they’ve done. ALL they’ve

done. Suckers.....I think they’d behave more if they knew I took notes.

I’m sure they’ll LOVE it when the truth comes out.  Personally I embarrass my own offspring daily by posting the ‘did they or didn’t they make the school bus’ song update. They truly hate it. I make up a song (actually I just take a song and change the lyrics around to indicate whether or not they made the bus) and post it on Facebook each day. 15’s band director was trying to get her to stop talking while out on the marching field last week and he said “Am I going to have to write a song about you?” THAT shut her up quickly.

So I hear that you’re a runner, me too. Now, do you run to work out and be healthy or do

you run just to say that you run and so you can get the damn shirts from the races to

wear in public so people know you run? Personally, I run for the t-shirt and the free beer

at the finish line.

Joy: Dude - I’m allllll about the shirts. Sweatshirts are even better. And the only thing I

like shopping for for myself is running shoes. Healthy smealthy. I like to eat. I run so I

can eat and wear fun ‘free’ shirts - I pay to run - not for the shirts....they’re free - yeah

free. And the beer’s not bad either!

Speaking of beer, what is your beverage of choice? Personally, I dig red wine. In mass

quantities. I know you’re not much of a coffee drinker, which is fine, because that’s more

for me. Because in the morning, without coffee, I could easily take out a school bus full

of handicapped nuns if they look at me the wrong way.

Joy: Let me know if you run low, and I’ll send you a membership to the Coffee Drinker

of the World club so you never ever run out. Without the nuns, I’d be a lost Catholic.

Save the Nuns!!

Without the Diet Dew, the safety of my community is at stake. It is a requirement for

national security and safety. Any diet caffeinated soda pop will work. But when I want

to have fun - I love margaritas. With lots of salt. And if we’re talking beer - it’s got to be

some Blue Moon with my fruit salad of oranges. None of this skinny slice of orange

crap - bring on the SLICES.

LOVE me some Blue Moon! You’ve got great taste in beers, even if you like them all fruity and girly. Now, if you could do anything in the world, anything at all, what would your dream

job be? Doesn’t matter if it’s real or made up. Like, if I could sit in my house and stroke

the soft fuzzy fur of baby bunnies all day and get paid for it, I’m all over it. How about

you?

Joy: We so are soul sisters. Soft furry animals..... I would pilot my own plane and fly

around the world delivering puppies. I’ve always (in real life) wanted to be a pilot. And

since it’s anything at all - I’d own my own plane and landing strip (and gas station). And

what’s more fun than delivering puppies? Seriously!!!?!

That sounds like an awesome job! How about this question: if you could be any cartoon

character, which would you be? If you could get rid of any cartoon character, who would

you off, and why?

Joy: I sort of dig the Road Runner. I like his sounds. Meep Meep! I like that he runs

and outsmarts the other guy. Frequently.

And I’d have to off.....it sounds bad but...Caillou. I CANNOT stand that whiney kid’s

voice. My spawn have all had an affinity for him and man - there is nothing worse than

hearing Caillou before ingesting the sweet nectar of life. He has a bowling ball for a

head and apparently will never grow any hair. WTHeck?

I’ve heard there are tons of people on the Down with Caillou bandwagon. Personally, I’d take out those damn Teletubbies. I’ve hated them since 15 was 2. And if I could be any cartoon character, I’d be Snoopy. I’ve always loved Snoopy and really, who wouldn’t want to nap on top of a doghouse that doubles as a Sopwith Camel??

Ok last and final question, what’s your favorite position?

Joy: Let’s see. I’m freaky flexible so there’s all sorts of possibilities. Dr. Evil enjoys the

calf stretch I do prior to running. I enjoy the ‘runner’s stretch.‘ How about you!?

Oh I’m partial to the downward dog, LOVE stretching out the back and the hammies.

Well folks, that’s all the time we have for Evil Joy but don’t forget to check out her blog, Evil Joy Speaks. She’s awesome and funny and it’s been a pleasure to have her on my show. Joy, have an awesome day!

Positive Panties

Oh for the love of Mike, what will they think of next?? My friend Siobhan sent me a link to this site because she knows how much I love to mock things. This one did not disappoint. Let's start at the beginning. This website, Kickstarter, is a great way for inventors to get their inventions noticed and raise some capital to get stuff done. If you're looking to make the next self-cleaning diaper/waffle-iron but you don't have the cash, you can throw it up on Kickstarter and try to raise the money. Now Siobhan comes across this little nugget (I actually didn't ask her how she found it, was she looking new ways to stay positive or just in the marker for new panties??) and sends me the link to Positive Panties. The tagline is a little disturbing: Curing crabbiness one sweet ass at a time. 

Now, call me crazy, but seriously, I never want to see the word panties and anything associated with crabs in the same sentence. That right there could be a deal breaker. How do you know that the positive panties you're backing aren't going to end up giving people positively itchy pubes?? Scroll down a little and you'll see a little background on the soul sisters who came up with the idea of Positive Panties, and they are admittedly 'dancing-in-our-seats-giddy' to share the idea with their community. How sure are we that that's not the crabs making them dance in their seats???

Keep reading, it gets better. That's right, when you're having a shit start to the morning, all grumpy and cranky, you open your panty drawer and spot those Positive Panties and all at once 'the bricks on your heart start breaking off and falling to the ground'. Wow, those are some damn powerful undies. And if you continue to scroll down past the 'ask', you'll see prototype positive panty pictures. The first pic just confuses me. The words across the front of these skivvies says: You are a mega fuck ton of awesome.  What the hell does that mean?? A mega fuck ton? I'm putting out a request right now of all my Snarkfest readers to PLEASE explain to me what a mega fuck ton of awesome is. Because dammit, I want to be THAT awesome!

One of their first goals (if you send them enough money to make these mega fuck ton of awesome panties) is to make them in plus sizes. Yay! Is that so people who are two mega fuck tons of awesome won't feel left out? And if you're looking for stocking stuffers for Christmas, look no further. These knickers are 'highly giftable!' Won't mom be so happy to know that she 'is going to rock this day so hard'? (another slogan across the panties).

Okay in all seriousness, I've got to give these ladies credit where credit is due. Not everyone would take their idea to the internet looking for public backing for what is, undoubtedly, an original idea: Power to make your day positive from wearing the right underwear. I applaud their spunk (sorry, bad pun) and tenacity in wanting to get these panty-thingies made. I wish them the best of luck in their endeavor and maybe one day, someone will surprise me with panties that tell me how hard I'm going to rock the day! Just make sure to wash them first. I hate crabby panties.

Thoughts from running in the rain...

So I went for a nice, long run yesterday afternoon. It was 46 degrees, rainy and cold. The whole time. When I finished my run, I couldn't feel my hands, but my head was clear, and I thought about a million things in those 2+ hours that I spent alone in the cold and rain.

I left with one specific goal in mind: I needed to tackle a hill. You see, I'm running the Freedoms Run Half Marathon this Saturday here in Shepherdstown, and it's second only to the Cincinnati Flying Pig half marathon when it comes to hills. I'm not sure how, but the Pig is 11 miles up hill, and 2 miles down. Don't ask me, I don't know how they work that, I just know I've done it twice and that was enough for me. No, the Freedoms Run is not as bad as Cincy, but it's a rough one. And the last hill I actually tackled was during the Tough Mudder last month in Frederick, MD. And by hill, I mean a wall of hay bales that I had to climb over. So I had some work to do. Luckily, it was just me, some cows and my thoughts.

I ran along the C & O Canal for a little over a mile and a half and as I approached the main hill that I wanted to tackle, Miller's Sawmill Road, I began to think about how lucky I am. I have some amazing friends. As I started up the beast that is Sawmill, I thought back to Friday night, traveling up to Philly and visiting with my best friend Mandie. We talk every day, but see each other far less than that. We were pregnant with out first babies together, and they were born 5 weeks apart. We lived together for awhile before there were husbands or kids in the picture, just cats. And we've remained close for years. I don't see her nearly enough but in our hearts, we know how much we love each other. And the thought of that love for my best friend got me to the top of Sawmill. And I felt so good, I decided to keep running, rather than turn back around and descend that hill.

Photo courtesy: Wunderground.com

On I ran, into the Antietam National Battlefield. As I chugged along THOSE hills, I thought about how I spent Saturday. The girls and I left Mandie's and went to visit with my brother, whom I have always looked up to and admired. My girls adore my brother and his family and it was great to see them again. From there, we headed down to Atlantic City to see my mom. Mom is in her 70's now and suffering from COPD (Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease). Mom used to be very active and was always running here or there. She hated driving and pretty much gave it up when I got my drivers license. No, mom always like walking places. If she had errands to run, she'd grab her pocketbook and head out on foot to wherever the day took her. Sadly, these days, she rarely ventures outside. Walking into the kitchen to make a pot of coffee leaves her struggling to catch her breath and she is on pretty much constant oxygen now. And as I ran the hills at Antietam Battlefield, I thought about how lucky I am that I've got strong legs to carry me over those hills and strong lungs to allow me to run, unencumbered, by bronchial issues. My heart breaks for my mom because she hates being cooped up AND baseball season is over for her beloved Phillies. So she pretty much stays in her apartment resting in her retirement, unable to really run around like she used to. And as I hit mile 7 yesterday, I finished up the last hill in the battlefield and headed back toward Sawmill, feeling great and happy that I'm healthy enough now to complete such an undertaking, when I know my mom would never again even be able to walk those hills. Not with her walker, not with an oxygen tank. Not ever.

It was so hard to leave my mom on Sunday because it's so hard to get back to see her with 15 & 12's sports and activity schedule, but looking back now, I know we need to get back more often, because I don't know how many more visits there will be. And as we left her apartment building, I cried. I cried because I miss my mom and it gets harder and harder to leave her with each visit. And as I ran down Sawmill, trying to feel my thumbs, and trying to keep from rolling down like a giant bowling ball, I laughed at myself for being such an emotional goof. And I promised myself that I will call my mom everyday, just like I used to when I lived back in Jersey.

And once I arrived at the bottom of the beast, I had about a mile and a half to finish on the Canal before I could be warm and dry in the comfort of my car. While I ran that last bit, I thought of how we spent Sunday night, in the company of our old neighbors. Our warm, caring old neighbors, with whom we'd spent countless days and nights, sitting on their back deck, drinking wine or beer, while the kids drank juices and bounced on the trampoline. Their boys and my girls were like siblings and spent so much time together. It was so hard to say goodbye to them when we left, and as I walked in their front door and hugged Fran, I forgot how much I loved her and how much I had missed her, and again, I cried. And as I finished up mile 11 yesterday, I smiled at how hard we laughed and how it felt as though I had never left. We picked right back up, chatting and laughing while the kids talked and played chess and walked to the store for us. We ate pizza and drank coffee and caught up. And I loved it.

We had a fantastic trip back 'home' to visit family and friends, and then came back to West Virginia to our new family and friends, and I got to enjoy the best of them both as I ran my 11 miles yesterday. I am so lucky to have so many wonderful people in my life, and I am so thankful for what I have. The run really helped clear out the cobwebs, and I'm grateful that I have the ability to run, because not everyone does.

The Sisterhood of the World Blogger Award

After being away all weekend, I was so honored to come home and see that I've been awarded the Sisterhood of the World Blogger Award from those sexy and awesome ladies over at The Mommy Chronicles! Those ladies are wonderful and I totally love reading their stuff, so if you get a chance, please go check them out. You will NOT be disappointed, I promise.

As with all of the awards I've seen or been lucky enough to receive, there are rules, as well as paying it forward, so here goes.

1. Thanks the blogger that gave you the award.
2. Post 7 things about yourself.
3. Pick 7 blogs to pass the award to, and let them know!

So without further ado, my most sincere thanks to those great gals at The Mommy Chronicles!! You ladies are the best and I am honored to be in such great company.

Now, here are 7 totally random things about me:
1. My desk is an absolute cluttered mess.
2. I ran 11 miles today in the cold rain because I'm running the Freedoms Run Half Marathon this weekend
3. My husband looks like Tom Hanks
4. I don't look like Rita Wilson (Mrs. Tom Hanks)
5. The first album I ever bought was Queen: News of the World
6. I had a huge crush on Scott Baio when he was Chachi, and truth be told, I'd still hit that
7. My favorite wine is red, my favorite brands are Kenwood and Rancho Zabaco.

Lastly, here are my 7 nominees for this award. Not easy considering there are so many amazing bloggers out there but here goes:
1. Abby Has Issues
2. Evil Joy Speaks
3. Mom-Spirational
4. Life on Peanut Layne
5. Frugalista Blog
6. Pesky Pippi
7. What I Had REALLY Meant to Say Was...

So go check out The Mommy Chronicles, and then go check out all these talented and funny ladies I've nominated for this award!

Tell 'em Snarky sent you.

Do you believe in ghosts? Spirits? Spooky Stuff?

It's October, the witching month!! (ok I totally made that shit up) but it is the time of year when you start seeing pumpkins, witches, ghouls, goblins and the like everywhere. In store fronts, at garden centers and even in your neighborhood, the Halloween decorations are all over the place. In getting into that spirit, I pose a question to all of my wonderful snarklings: Do you believe in ghosts?

One of my friends just posted on Facebook that she thought that her house was haunted. She said she saw a male ghost in her house and naturally freaked out. The next day her husband said he saw the same thing but thought it was a dream so he didn't mention it. Yesterday, she said her little girl saw it as well and was extremely freaked out about it (as anyone would be!) This is not an isolated incident among my friends. I have many friends and neighbors who say they see creepy things in their houses, and believe that they may actually inhabit haunted houses.

Not all of them are scary, some of them are playful and some are completely harmless. But there are just too many of them to just discount or write off. I do enjoy watching Jay and Grant on Ghost Hunters (well, I did before Grant left), and always get excited when they actually do happen to capture the rare image on video (that you can actually make out) or a creepy voice on the voice recorders. But do I actually believe in ghosts? Do I think that they are out there and they are all around us? Truthfully? I really don't know. I used to have night terrors (sometimes I still do) where I'd wake up half way and see things, bugs, beings, whatever and I'd start screaming! My husband LOVES when I do that. (Sorry honey). Is that related to any kind of haunting or am I just really in a deep fugue and imagine wasps flying around in my bedroom? Is there really someone walking into my bedroom, uninvited and unwelcomed? Or is my imagination really going to town? Who knows?

But I'd love to hear your stories. Tell me what you believe, what your thoughts are on ghosts and goblins and things that go bump in the night. Don't be afraid, I'll hold your hand......