Is it wrong?

Is it wrong that I can't wait until basketball season is over? Is it wrong that I CAN wait until track season starts? I believe we may actually have about 2, maybe 3 weeks from the time the buzzer signals the end of the last basketball game until the first day of track tryouts. And naturally, because I birthed two athletic babies, they have to tryout. 15 is a hurdler and 13 runs the 400 and throws shot and discus. I drive. A lot.  With my husband's daily commute, the onus is on me to get everyone from point A to point B while holding down a full time job. My favorite thing (not) to hear is "Why weren't you here to watch me??" Is it wrong that I just can't do it all? Don't get me wrong. In an absolutely perfect world I'd be at every meet, every race, every game. But sadly, it's not a perfect world.

I LOVE watching my kids play, compete, perform, etc. If I had the means and the ability, I'd be there every single time. But it's just not possible. I just can't be there for every single event. Jesus, I have no idea HOW people with more than 2 kids do it! At the beginning of each season, I love seeing the excited look on their faces, the newness, the anticipation of diving head first into the sport. But by the last full week of games, it is I who cannot wait for it all to be over. I sigh the biggest sigh of relief that it's over and I can relax (temporarily) because that was the last thing on the schedule (for now).

Is that wrong? Is it wrong that I just am tickled at the idea of driving home from work and NOT having to go back out to pick one up from practice or rush home to feed the dogs before heading back out into the night to another game? I am so psyched at the idea of actually sitting down to a family dinner in the evening, one where all four of us are at the table! And no one has to rush out for anything (other than maybe ice cream from the store, I'm always excited about ice cream).

I'm sure some mom, somewhere, will read this and think: "I just want my children to be happy and I'm more than willing to bend over backwards to make them that way." That mother is obviously a crack whore with no concept of reality. Because the reality of it is, yes, we ALL want the best for our children, but at what price? We have a sit down meal where we are all at the table, probably twice a month. Three times if we're lucky. The rest of the month, we're running around, practice here, game here, sleepover there, party over yonder. Is this what I had in mind when I thought about having kids? No flipping way.

Would I trade it for all the chocolate at Hershey? Not for a second. I love my kids and I love that they are active and I'm so blessed that they are healthy and able. They stay busy and for the most part, they stay out of trouble. And while it's a pain in the butt being responsible for juggling their schedules, I wouldn't give it up for anything. Yes, I'll kvetch about how hard it is and how tired I am. But in the end, it is worth it.

I say that because I stopped at 2 kids. Had I had a gaggle, a flock or a herd, I would probably be singing a different tune.

Ungrateful 15

Let me tell you a little story about my oldest child. I love her like no one I've ever loved with the exception of her sister. I am more proud of her than you can ever begin to imagine. She is the light of my life, the cream in my coffee, the jelly to my peanut butter. But tonight, I was ready to put her up for sale to the highest bidder. Look up ungrateful in the dictionary, you will find 15's picture.

Let me elaborate. It all started this morning at 6:05 when I woke her ass up the first time. Then continued at 6:10, 6:15 and 6:20 when I went back up to get her up again (and again and again). She finally dragged her ass into the shower at 6:35. Naturally, at 7:00 when the bus came (and went) she wasn't on it.  And naturally, being the idiot sucker kindhearted mom that I am, I drove her (again). Ask me how many times she    missed the bus last week. Go ahead, ask.

Fast forward to this evening. At 7:00 I arrived at her high school to pick her up from basketball practice and headed to the middle school to her sister's basketball game. IMMEDIATELY upon entering the car, she informs me that they have to dress up for tomorrow's basketball game in Virginia, and that she has NO nice dressy clothes to wear, so would I PLEASE take her to Kohls and buy her some nice new dressy clothes. Yes, she's asking me to blow off her sister's basketball game to take her to buy new clothes because the poor thing has no nice things to wear. "She'll have like, 14000 other games, it's okay if you miss this one." The answer was no. I'm not taking her to buy her anything new when I know for a fact that she's got tons of nice clothes in her room. They're just buried under all the shit that's on her floor. Oh yeah, and did I mention she missed the bus AGAIN?? Yeah, maybe had she MADE the bus this morning I'd be a little more willing to drive her to Kohls and buy her pretty things But dammit, she didn't and she just thinks it's my obligation to do as she wishes. I know damn well she's got nice dressy black pants in that mess she calls a room. She also has several pretty sweaters and blouses and camis she can wear with them. But no, because she can't find them, she doesn't have them so I MUST take her shopping.

Then, while we're sitting at her sister's game, the husband asked me what my plan is for tomorrow. I explained that I'll pick 13 up from practice and then head to the band booster meeting at the high school. 15 perks up and says "You're not coming to MY game??? You can't miss 13's game but you can miss MY game???" Well, let me just calmly explain that I'll be attending the first band booster meeting I've been able to attend in 3 months. Ask me why I've missed the last 3 months. Well, I'll tell you. Because I was busy working in the concession stand at high school JV football games and soccer games. Now, let me clarify something for those who think, 'wow, what an awful mom, she can miss the older daughter's games but not the younger??' I am a member of the band boosters organization for the high school marching band, an organization to which 15 belongs. And when I miss a band booster meeting because I'm working concessions, it's because every time I work in the concession stand, I earn money for 15's band account, which means she gets to go on trips and events and it doesn't cost much money out of pocket. So I'm not just blowing off her game, as I believe she thinks, but I'm trying to catch up on what I've missed over the past 3 months.

Since we arrived home from 13's game I have been confronted with nothing but attitude, nastiness and disrespect. I left to run to the grocery store and when I came back, I did receive an apology, which I accepted, but I did NOT forgive. And now she is uploading stuff onto her iPod for the bus trip to her game tomorrow and is out of money on her iTunes, so she's asking if she can use the money on my account and pay me back (in quarters). Really???

Why is it that she is only nice and kind to me when she wants something from me? Why does she think that I am here for her to walk on and treat like shit? I have become a doormat for my 15 year old daughter. And apparently, I've allowed it to happen. Well, no more.

How do you handle disrespectful offspring? How many of my fellow moms or dads have allowed themselves to become doormats? What does YOUR doormat say? Mine must say "Tread on me".