Let's get one thing straight right now. If you dress up your dog, your cat, your hamster, guinea pig, giraffe, Beta fish, whatever, he HATES you. He wants to tear out your throat. He wants to eat your liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti. Seriously.
My friends who know me well will tell you, I absolutely HATE to see animals dressed up. If they had thumbs and the ability to call a lawyer, they'd sue your ass in a heartbeat. They only put up with you dressing them up because they don't have thumbs and can't feed themselves. Do they chew on your shoes? Do they pee or poop in the house? It's most likely due to the fact that at some point in time, you've done this to them:
|This is not a happy kitty.|
Photo courtesy: TrendHunter.com
Admit it, if someone did that to you and you were powerless to fight back or stand up for yourself, you'd want to kill them too. I'm not exactly sure why one does this to an animal. It's not funny (okay it's a little funny) but it's also borderline animal cruelty. Admit it. You're laughing at this cat. He's looking at you and in his little cat brain he's saying "Could you please have at least removed the Goddamn tag before you put this shit on me?? Who the hell am I? Minnie Pearl???" Because he knows who Minnie Pearl is. No self-respecting, costume wearing cat wouldn't know who Minnie Pearl is.
Then we have this poor little bastard:
|Kareem Abdul Japug|
Photo courtesy: VH1 (don't ask)
Seriously, what kind of sick bastard does this to a dog? Doesn't his owner know that he's not only going to get the shit kicked out of him by all the other neighborhood dogs, but he'll need therapy too because white pugs can't jump. For chrissakes, everyone knows that. Wrong. Just so wrong. If you do this to your pet, you deserve for him to jump on your balls and make you spill your beer all over yourself.
I have no words for this picture:
|Seriously, wtf is that? Photo courtesy: dailymail.co.uk|
And this poor little bastard is wishing those other two heads were actually REAL so he'd have some help when he climbs up on the bed while you're sleeping and tears your arms off and beats you to death with them:
|"I am not amused, asshole." Photo courtesy: funnyfidos.com|
|Yes, fluffy, sadly you do. Photo courtesy: Kodak.com|
|I am NOT a pilot, I am an angry dog. Photo courtesy: nynerd.com|
|Superheroes. No. Super pissed off? You betcha! Photo courtesy: cdn.hahajk.com|